Noisebridge - User contributions [en]

Artbridge

2017-08-03T01:32:31Z

89.31.57.5:

“Hailey, Hailey. Can you hear me?” Mrs. Miklosovic spoke as she saw Hailey open her eyes.
“Mom?” Hailey responded in a faint voice.
“Thank God! You’ve been out since Thursday.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s Saturday night right now. You’ve been unconscious for two full days.”
“I don’t understand.”
“When I came back from work Thursday and knocked on your door, you didn’t answer. I figured you were just napping. But when I came in to say goodnight later, you weren’t responsive at all. Then I realized…”
“Realized what?”
“I thought you might be having another growth attack and ended up fainting. So I touched your breasts to see if they were hot. And that’s when I knew you were having a growth spurt.”
“What?!” Hailey looked down to realize she was in bed with her breasts sprawled out and covered in wet towels. Then it came to her attention how warm and swollen her breasts felt. Hailey quickly slid her hands underneath her breasts to feel their weight. They felt much heavier. In fact, she was having trouble lifting them at all. Granted, her arms weren’t in the best position to exert strength. But her breasts had never been too heavy for Hailey to lift them while in bed. She then immediately tried lifting her right breast with both hands. To her relief, Hailey was able to do it. Unfortunately, Hailey could also feel just how bigger her breasts have gotten from her grip. “They grew so much!”
“Well the good news is that you’re awake now. And the growth attack seems to be easing. When I was placing wet towels on your breasts last night, I could actually see your breasts pulsing from all the blood rushing in. And they got so hot that eventually we had to put ice packs on them. That continued for at least twelve hours. Lily and I took turns taking care of you.”
“How is anything good news, mom!? I just had a growth attack! Are you blind!?”
“Hailey, I know it’s very scary for you right now. But you shouldn’t take it out on your mother.”
“I’m sorry, mom. You’re right. I just need to calm down. Could you get me some Ibuprofen? I’ve got a bad headache.”
“Of course, sweetie. I’ll be back in a minute.” Mrs. Miklosovic left downstairs to the kitchen.
‘Fuck me… Just how big did my breasts get? Dr. Prince should have just prescribed me some estrogen blockers on Thursday. Then this probably wouldn’t have happened. Doctors are always too careful. I should’ve just insisted. God, they feel so big. Wait, I should see how big they are in the mirror.’
Hailey removed the wet towels on her breasts, got up, and slowly walked up to the full body mirror in her room. As urgent as she was to see how big her breasts had gotten, they were still too tender for her to move quickly. Making them wobble was the last thing she wanted. When Hailey saw herself in the mirror, she couldn’t believe her eyes. Her breasts now sagged past her hips. And they were so full that they now pushed each other to the side beyond her arms. In fact, the entirety of her forearms now hid behind her breasts. Being only 5’3 with a petite build, it was beginning to look as if her body was attached to her breasts rather than the other way around.
To gauge how heavier her breasts had gotten, Hailey gently lifted them up. They felt as heavy as a twelve-pound bowling ball. Although she never went bowling anymore, Hailey had once been an avid bowler. She was in fact quite good and easily scored above two-hundred. Of course, once her breasts became the size of the bowling balls, she had to quit from all the leering, cat calling, and unwanted sexual advances. That was three years ago. Nevertheless, Hailey still intimately knew how a twelve-pound mass felt in her hands. There was no doubt about it. Each of her breasts now weighed just around twelve pounds.
But Hailey noticed something else as well as she lifted up her breasts. Her belly was as flat as a board and her waist could only be described as “rail-thin.” Those had been the two areas where all the fat would go to whenever she put on weight. Hailey wondered: ‘Could it be that during the last three growth attacks, my breasts were taking fat from other parts of my body to grow? That’d make sense since I didn’t really eat anything when the growth was happening. But who cares if I have flat stomach and a thin waist? They never show because my breasts are too big.’
Her nipples and areolas weren’t spared from the growth attack either. Just looking at them embarrassed Hailey. Her nipples seemed to have gotten both longer and thicker. When Hailey turned sideways, they seem to protrude as much as one inch. And when Hailey gently held her nipples between her fingers, they felt thicker than a plastic soda bottle lid. And her areolas were now so large that she could barely cover them with both of her hands.
Stepping closer to the mirror, Hailey could now see the damage the last three growth spurts had inflicted on her skin. There were countless fine wrinkles that ran vertically from the very top of her breasts to where they were the fullest. With each breast weighing over ten pounds, it was only natural for the skin to stretch down and form wrinkles. But now, after having undergone three intense growth attacks in a matter of days, the wrinkles cut significantly deeper. Looking at the skin alone, Hailey’s breasts seemed more like the breasts of a sixty-year-old woman than the breasts of a nineteen-year-old girl.
‘I look like a monster.’ As abhorring as her breasts looked in the mirror, Hailey couldn’t take her eyes of them. She couldn’t believe that it was her breasts that she was seeing in the mirror. For the first time in her life, she felt as if it was her body that was stuck to her breasts rather than the other way around. ‘Would they even be able to make a custom bra for me anymore?’ Hailey took out a bra she brought home from her backpack so that she could try it on and imagine how a custom bra might fit her with her current size.
But before Hailey could put it on, her nipples flared up with gruesome intensity. The orgasmic sensation in her nipples was so strong that she couldn’t move at all. It felt as if her nipples were experiencing a hundred orgasms every half second. Hailey’s mind went completely blank. At this point, her body wasn’t feeling pleasure; her body was pleasure. She didn’t know who she was. She was simply what she felt: an unrelenting wave of euphoric orgasms. Rapidly, the orgasmic sensation in her nipples spread to her entire breasts. Giving in to this unrelenting wave of pleasure, Hailey collapsed to the floor. She was still conscious, but she had no control of her body. And she only knew one thing: she was about to have the most aggressive growth attack of her life.
“Hailey!” Mrs. Miklosovic shouted as she opened the door and saw Hailey topless and collapsed on the floor. Rushing to her side, Mrs. Miklosovic called out her husband. “Mike! Come here!”
Hailey was mortified at the thought of her father seeing her topless. With her father and brothers, Hailey felt particularly shameful about her breasts. Not only did she feel ashamed to have such freakish breasts, but she also felt ashamed to just simply have breasts. She could never understand why. It was only natural for a girl to have breasts although her breasts themselves could only be described as “freaks of nature.”
If she had been able to, Hailey would have told her mom to call off her dad or at least cover her breasts so he wouldn’t see her bare breasts. But overcome with a ruthless wave of orgasms cresting every half second, Hailey couldn’t speak – let alone mouth something.
“What’s wrong, Alice?” Mr. Miklosovic asked as he walked in. Realizing that his daughter was topless on the floor, Mr. Miklosovic quickly blocked the view with his hands.
“Mike, help me get Hailey to the bed.” Mrs. Miklosovic spoke as she locked her arms in front of Hailey’s her chest from behind. “Grab her legs.”
“Okay. But what happened?” Mr. Miklosovic grabbed Hailey’s legs while averting his eyes from his daughter’s upper body.
“She’s having a growth spurt again. She can barely speak right now.” Mrs. Miklosovic spoke as she attempted to lift Hailey. But as hard as she tried, Hailey’s upper body – with her breasts that now weighed well over 20 pounds together – was too heavy for Mrs. Miklosovic. “Come on, let’s switch sides. This side is too heavy for me.”
“Just try harder.” Mr. Miklosovic balked at the idea of having his hands and arms in contact with his daughter’s breasts.
“Mike, come on. They’re just your daughter’s breasts. There’s nothing sexual or wrong about it. Let’s get Hailey on the bed so I can place wet towels on her breasts.” Mr. Miklosovic relented.
Hailey could tell his dad was trying his best to avoid minimize the contact between his arms and her breasts. But it was no use. Hailey’s breasts were simply too voluptuous. As she felt her dad’s arms pushing into her breasts, Hailey thought she felt Mr. Miklosovic felt more shame than she had ever had in her entire life. She felt more shame than the time her bra snapped during a school play and the entire audience saw her right breast droop to her belly. She felt more shame than the time her breasts made her blouse pop open in front of her older brother. She even felt more shame than the time her roommate, Kate, caught her playing with her nipples and masturbating.
“I can feel them pulsing. I can feel the blood being pumped in there. Shouldn’t we do something?” Mr. Miklosovic felt beyond awkward to talk about his daughter’s breasts with his wife, but he felt obligated to bring the throbbing of Hailey’s breasts to his wife’s attention.
“It always happens during a growth attack. Just get me some wet towels from the bathroom. Be sure to soak them in cold water. I’m just going to call her doctor.” Ms. Miklosovic replied nonchalantly as she settled Hailey on the bed. She then took out her phone and called Dr. Prince. Although it was Saturday night, Ms. Miklosovic was confident that Dr. Prince would understand given the gravity of the situation.
“Hello?” Dr. Prince picked up.
“Dr. Prince, this is Hailey Miklosovic’s mother. I’m sorry to bother you at this hour, especially on a Saturday. But Hailey’s having a severe growth attack. Could you possibly come to our house right now?”
“Mrs. Miklosovic, I’m afraid I’m out town at the moment and I won’t be back until Wednesday night. So the earliest I could see your daughter would be Thursday morning. But I’d like to help in any capacity over the phone. How is Hailey doing right now exactly?”
“She was complaining of a headache. And when I came back with some Ibuprofen, I found her collapsed on the floor. She can hardly move and speak cause just how intense the growth attack is. Her breasts are pulsing really strongly and feel really hot right now. She’s also breathing heavily.”
“Is she still conscious?”
“I’m not sure but I think so.”
“Make sure to give her a lot of water. And after she drinks a full glass of water, give her some sleeping pills. Just help her sleep through the growth until it subsides. And also be sure to constantly cool down her breasts with wet towels and ice packs. And also have them well moisturized. We really don’t want the skin to break or develop any lesion. Hailey’s severe hemophilia coupled with gigantomastia could become potentially life-threatening if we don’t take care of the skin on her breasts.”
“Anything else we should do, Dr. Prince?”
“Yes! It is of vital importance that Hailey consume sufficient nutrition. Due to the intensity of the growth, she could very easily become malnourished. We don’t want to endanger Hailey’s entire health. And last but not least, please tell Hailey to hold on and that we’ll figure this out.”
“Thank you, Dr. Prince.”
“You’re welcome, Mrs. Miklosovic. Just try to stay strong for Hailey. And try not to jump to the worst conclusion. The worst scenarios hardly ever happen. Well, goodnight ma’am.”
“Goodnight.” Dr. Prince hung up.
“Here are some wet towels.” Mr. Miklosovic spoke as he walked in with a bunch of wet towels in his hands.
“Thanks, Mike. I was just on the phone with the doctor. He told us we should give her some sleeping pills so she can just sleep it off. Could you get some from the pharmacy? And tell Lily to get in here on your way out.”
“No problem. But Alice, could you cover her up please? I really don’t want to be seeing my daughter’s breasts.”
“They’re just breasts, Mike. And you’ve seen my boobs a million times. And I can’t because that’ll trap the heat.”
“Fine. But all I’m saying is it’s just a really uncomfortable thing for a father. And seeing your wife’s breasts and seeing your daughter’s breasts are not even remotely similar.” Mr. Miklosovic spoke as he walked out.
“Sweetie, dad’s gonna get you some sleeping pills so you can sleep this off. Just stay strong, okay?” Ms. Miklosovic spoke as Hailey gasped for air. The truth is, the relentless wave of orgasms had been getting stronger and stronger the whole time. And Hailey was fighting tooth and nail to hold in her moaning. Out of sheer embarrassment, Hailey had never told anyone about the intense orgasms she experienced during growth attacks. Even Dr. Prince didn’t know. And Hailey was determined to keep it that way. Moreover, having her parents hear her sex noise was the last thing she wanted.
“Hi, mom. Dad told me. Do you want me to grab some ice packs from the freezer?” Lily asked as she walked in.
“That would be great.” Mrs. Miklosovic replied.
“Bathroom.” Hailey spoke in a barely audible voice as Lily was about to leave. As much as she hated to admit it, Hailey needed to pee and there was no way she could do it on her own; she could hardly lift a finger. The good thing was Hailey didn’t need to worry about covering her loins with her hands, which she couldn’t move one bit at the moment. This was because her breasts would naturally be sitting on her lap and blocking the view. The bad news was Hailey, through no fault of her own, had soaked her panties. The endless wave of orgasms was making her wetter than she thought was humanly possible.
“Did you say ‘bathroom?’” Mrs. Miklosovic asked. Hailey nodded. “Lily, come here and help me get your sister to the bathroom. We’ll have her arms over our shoulders and help her walk there since we won’t be strong enough to just carry her just the two of us.”
“Okay, mom.”
Mrs. Miklosovic and Lily gently got Hailey out of bed and strapped her arms across their shoulders. But just as they started walking Hailey to the bathroom, Hailey squealed in pain. They came to an abrupt stop.
“What’s wrong?” Mrs. Miklosovic asked.
“My… breasts.” Hailey spoke in a barely audible voice as she gasped for air.
“What do you mean? Do they hurt?”
“Hold. Hurt… too much… from moving.” Hailey panted. Although Hailey didn’t want her mom and sister to holding her breasts, she also desperately needed support for her breasts. The pain from them wobbling was beyond excruciating. And at this point with her dad having seen and touched her breasts, there wasn’t much that could mortify her.
“Mom, I think she wants us to hold her breasts so they don’t move.” Lily interjected. Hailey nodded. “We can just hold her arms with our one hand and hold her breasts with the other hand.”
“Lily, be careful with your sister’s nipples. They’re extremely sensitive.”
“I know, Mom. Wow, they’re really heavy!” Lily remarked as she gently lifted Hailey’s right breast with her left hand.
“Lily, how do you think that makes your sister feel?” Mrs. Miklosovic scolded Lily. And she was right in doing so. Hailey felt horrible at her sister’s remark. In fact, this was the first time she heard anyone say how heavy her breasts were. Hailey had been asked on a number of occasions by friends and strangers how heavy they were. But being told that her breasts are “really heavy” felt far worse than being asked if her breasts are heavy. Lily’s comment stung particularly hard because Lily as a 32G had to know how heavy even just some mounds of fat can be really heavy.
“Oh sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. Sorry, Hailey.”
Step by step, Mrs. Miklosovic and Lily walked Hailey to the bathroom.
“Wait outside while I help your sister.” Mrs. Miklosovic told Lily as she closed the bathroom door.
When Ms. Miklosovic pulled down Hailey’s shorts and panties, she noticed something strange. Hailey’s panties as well as her loins were soaked. At first, Mrs. Miklosovic thought it was urine. But it was milky and white. It had to be vaginal lubrication. Concerned something else might be wrong with Hailey, Mrs. Miklosovic asked, “Hailey, is this… vaginal lubrication?!”
Hailey nodded as she urinated. Never in a million year did Hailey expect anyone other than herself and significant others to see her wet. Out of sheer embarrassment, Hailey found herself choking up.
“What’s going on? Is there something else you’re not telling us? It’s important that we know everything that’s going on so we can help you in the best possible way. Does Dr. Prince know?”
Hailey shook her head. She knew her mom was right. It was important that she was fully transparent with what was happening with her body. Of course, it was easier said than done.
“Hailey, this has to stop right now. When we go to Dr. Prince’s office on Thursday, you should tell him everything. No more keeping things from us.” Mrs. Miklosovic wiped Hailey and pull up her panties and shorts. “Lily, come in. Help mom carry your sister.”
With Hailey’s arms strapped around their shoulders, Mrs. Miklosovic and Lily walked Hailey to the bed and carefully laid her down. They exercised extra caution in positioning her breasts. They didn’t want Hailey’s breasts to move too much or her nipples rub against anything.
“Lily, get some lotion from the bathroom. We have to apply lotion on Hailey’s breasts.”
“Wait, why?”
“Because they’re growing really fast and we need to minimize the stress on her skin. Hurry”
As Lily went to the bathroom to get some lotion, Mr. Miklosovic came back home with some sleeping pills. Looking away from Hailey, Mr. Miklosovic dropped them off by Hailey’s bed and went outside. Hailey was relieved that she would finally be able to sleep through the growth spurt. The orgasms were now coming even stronger, and she knew quite soon wouldn’t be able to hold in her moaning any longer.
After Lily came back with some lotion, Mrs. Miklosovic and Lily squeezed half a bottle of lotion on Hailey’s breasts. And as they started to gently rub lotion over her breasts, Hailey could feel the orgasmic sensation in her breasts intensify. Hailey bit her lower lip to keep herself from moaning.
“Wow, they’re throbbing so hard. They feel so hot too.” Lily spoke as she carefully spread the lotion with her hands.
“Lily, didn’t I tell you to watch what you say? Think before you speak.”
“I’m sorry. I was trying to say it’s good we’re applying lotion of them. Mom, should we be lotioning her nipples too?”
Hailey desperately shook her head as much as she possibly could. She was okay with them rubbing lotion on other parts of her breasts since it was necessary. With the intensity of the growth attack, her skin was under tremendous stress. And as a result, it was a guarantee that her skin would break or develop lesion if lotion was amply applied to her breasts. However, Hailey felt she could do without having her nipples lotioned. Although they felt extremely raw and painfully hard, her nipples were where the orgasmic sensation was the strongest. If her mom and Lily applied lotion on them, Hailey didn’t know what kind of sound she’d let out against her will.
“Of course, Lily. If Hailey’s nipples grow too fast and end up cracking, there could be some bleeding. With your sister’s severe hemophilia, that’s not a chance we want to take.” Mrs. Miklosovic replied in a stern voice, not seeing her daughter shaking her head with all her might.
“But mom, Hailey’s shaking her head right now. I don’t think she wants us too. Maybe she doesn’t need any lotion applied on her nipples.” Lily protested, noticing that her sister was shaking her head albeit very slightly.
“Nope. Hailey does not get a say. Only her life does. We cannot allow this growth attack to become life-threatening. If your sister didn’t have severe hemophilia, it would be a different story. But that’s not the case for us. So we’ll just have to do our best not to hurt Hailey too much.” Turning to Hailey, Mrs. Miklosovic spoke, “Hailey, I know this is not what you want. But we need to do this. We don’t have any other choice.”
“Mom, Hailey’s the best judge for what she needs. If she says it’s not necessary, then it’s not.”
“Lily, not now. This is not up for discussion.”
“Fine. But if Hailey ends up hurting too much, I’m not gonna do it.”
Hailey bit into her lower lip even harder, determined not to let out any sound from the unbridled orgasms she was about to experience in her nipples. But it was no use. As soon as Mrs. Miklosovic’s finger lightly touched Hailey’s left nipple, Hailey shrieked in frenzy as her body fiercely trembled. She couldn’t help it. The orgasm in her nipple was too strong.
“See, mom? It’s hurting her like crazy. I’m not gonna be any part of this.” Lily spoke in a disapproving tone as she left the room. As embarrassed as Hailey was that her mom and sister had just heard her sex noise, she took solace in the fact that they didn’t know she had just shrieked from extreme pleasure, not pain.
Undeterred, Mrs. Miklosovic continued to apply lotion on her daughter’s nipples. And as her nipples kept being touched, Hailey shrieked and moaned louder and louder. Hailey knew everyone in the house could hear her. But she just couldn’t hold it in.
It could not have taken more than a minute for Mrs. Miklosovic to fully apply lotion on Hailey’s nipples, but it felt like hours to Hailey. Each time her nipples were touched no matter how lightly, she climaxed dozens of times with each one followed right by the next one. She was orgasming down to the millisecond. By the time Mrs. Miklosovic was done, Hailey had experienced well over a thousand orgasms.
“I’m so sorry, sweetie. But we needed to do this. I hope you can understand. Mom’s gonna change you into some clean underwear since your panties are soaked right now. Then you can drink some water, eat, and take a sleeping pill or two.”
Hailey shook her head. Her insecurities about how she looked down there were nowhere near as strong as her insecurities about her breasts. But it still a much more private part of her body. And although Hailey was thankful that she didn’t have any excess labia hanging out, she was extremely self-conscious about how puffy the lips were.
“Don’t worry, I’ll look away the entire time.” Mrs. Miklosovic reassured Hailey before changing Hailey’s panties. “I’ll cook you something quick before we put you to sleep. And I’ll have Lily put wet towels on your breasts while the food’s getting ready. You’ve been so brave, sweetie.” Mrs. Miklosovic left the room after kissing Hailey on the forehead.
‘Finally, the worst is over. I can just sleep this off. I’m going to lose my mind if I continue to orgasm non-stop. But what if the orgasms keep waking me up? Is that even possible? God, I wish someone could just chop off my breasts.’ Hailey thought to herself.
“I’m sorry that I couldn’t stop mom from applying lotion on your nipples. It sounded really painful. I was in the basement looking for my elementary school graduation pictures and I could still hear you screaming in pain.” Lily spoke as she entered the room with wet towels. “I know your nipples must be like fifty times more sensitive than mine right now. But my nipples have always been really sensitive and I can imagine how painful it must have been for you. And I didn’t really mean those comments I made. I’m sorry if they made you feel bad.”
As Lily was halfway through putting wet towels on Hailey’s breasts, Mrs. Miklosovic walked in.
“There was some leftover pasta from last night. So I just microwaved the leftovers since it’ll be a lot quicker this way. Let’s get your sister to sit up on the bed so she can drink and eat.” Mrs. Miklosovic spoke to Lily as she walked to one side of the bed.
Surprisingly, Hailey ended up eating two full plates of pasta and drinking three glasses of milk. Hailey was never the type to even finish her food. For her entire life, she had always been rail-thin. Of course, when her breasts started developing, she was no longer a “rail.” Nevertheless, she was still thin in every part of her body. The orgasms made swallowing a bit of a challenge. But Hailey ate as fast as she could, wanting to sleep off the growth spurt as soon as possible.
“Here you go, sweetie.” Mrs. Miklosovic handed Hailey a sleeping pill with a glass of water.
“Thanks, mom.” Hailey swallowed the pill with great relief; she could finally catch a break from all the sensations in her breasts and nipples.
When Hailey opened her eyes, the room was pitch dark and all that she could see was some streetlight sneaking in through the blinds. The last thing she remembered was coming back home from Dr. Prince’s office. ‘Strange… I must have napped for at least ten hours then. Was I even that tired?’ Feeling a bit groggy, Hailey got out of bed to go to the bathroom and splash some cold water on her face. And as she got out of bed to throw on a shirt before heading to the bathroom, Hailey noticed that her breasts felt much heavier than usual. In fact, so much so that she almost fell forward from the weight. But what alarmed her even more was how her breasts were abundantly touching her thighs. Sheer panic struck.
Hailey quickly turned on the lights and rushed to see her reflection in the mirror. She couldn’t believe her eyes. Each of her breasts was now as big as her torso! They stuck out well past her arms to the sides and sagged down to the middle of her thighs. Her areolas were now as wide as a small frying pan. And her nipples, now noticeably pointing downwards as well as outwards, seemed to protrude as much as two inches.
‘It’s a dream. This has to be a dream! No way, no way…’ Hailey shook her head as she backed away from the mirror in disbelief. But then suddenly she recalled collapsing to the floor from overwhelming orgasmic sensations in her nipples. She couldn’t remember what day it was or what happened afterwards. But the memory of falling down itself was vivid. She definitely wasn’t dreaming. ‘Wait, this means I must have passed out during a growth spurt. How many days have I been out?’
Hailey walked over to her bed to get her phone. But the added weight of her breasts made her gait extremely unnatural and uncomfortable. Her balance had all changed. Now, she had to make a conscious effort to lean backwards to actually not fall forward. There was tremendous stress on her calves and lower back to maintain her delicate balance. Moreover, her breasts now swayed from side to side like a heavy pendulum as she walked. Before, they would only wobble and jiggle mostly up and down. But now with their increased weight, her breasts no longer moved so much vertically. And instead, they moved side to side. Lastly, Hailey couldn’t swing her arms anymore with her breasts sticking out to the sides so much.
It was a Thursday, a full week after she went to see Dr. Prince. ‘Does this mean I’ve had a growth attack that lasted an entire week? And I was unconscious the whole time?!’ Hailey was confused. She had utterly no recollection of what happened between the moment she collapsed and now. All she knew was that she had just underwent the most aggressive growth attack and that it lasted about a week.
Hailey also saw that there were fifty-seven missed calls from her boyfriend Sandy. And there were a total of eighty-three unread text messages. Of course, her dating and social life were least of her concerns at the moment. She needed to know exactly what had happened. And she couldn’t wait for her mom to wake up. She needed to ask right now. Hailey put on her bathrobe as none of her shirts were long enough to cover her breasts anymore. Her bathrobe, of course, was no extremely stretched and Hailey looked uncomfortably tight around the bust area. But she had no choice.
But just as she was about to leave her room, Hailey’s mom walked in.
“You’re awake!” Mrs. Miklosovic spoke in a quiet but excited voice.
“Mom, what just happened?” Hailey asked anxiously.
“You had a growth attack last Thursday. That lasted about two days. And then you had another growth attack right after. That lasted till last night. You were physically responsive but you also seemed quite out of it. You’d be able to chew food and drink water. But you weren’t able to really speak back to us. Thankfully, the growth subsided around ten o’clock last night. I was coming in to check in on you, to make sure if you weren’t having another growth attack. Dr. Prince should be here any minute now.”
“Dr. Prince? He’s coming here right now? But it’s not even seven in the morning.”
“I know. He said he’d come see you on his way to office. We thought it’d be better for him to come than for us to go see him.”
“Okay. So-“ Before Hailey could finish her sentence, the door bell rang.
“That must be him. I’ll get the door. We’ll come upstairs.” Mrs. Miklosovic headed downstairs.
‘Oh god, I just hope he doesn’t have any more bad news…” Hailey thought to herself as walked over to her bed. Getting into her bed proved a little challenging with her torso-sized breasts. To avoid having her nipples rub against the sheets, Hailey had to sit on the bed, lie on her back, and then move inwards as she turned sideways. As Hailey adjusted her breasts for comfort, she realized she couldn’t even reach her own nipples. They were simply too far down. Hailey could feel her eyes get teary. But just then, someone knocked on the door.
“Hailey, Dr. Prince is here.” Mrs. Miklosovic spoke as she entered with Dr. Prince.
“Hi, Hailey. I hope you are doing okay despite the recent development. I have your lab results. Would you like to go over them first?” Dr. Prince asked Hailey.
“Sure…” Hailey was too scared to hear anything about her condition. But she knew she’d have to know what was going on with her body to make the most informed decision for her treatment.
“For better or for worse, your estrogen levels as well as all your other hormone levels were within a normal range. Your estrogen levels were quite high but still within the realm of normal.”
“What does that really mean? In terms of treatment? Is there even anything we can do then?” Hailey asked in a desperate tone.
“I’m afraid it means any form of treatment can be expected to be as ineffective as it was in the past. None of the treatments we tried produced any results. Since we never could identify the underlying cause for your breasts’ growth, any treatment was a shot in the dark. Our situation, unfortunately, remains the same. We still don’t know what’s causing your breasts to grow.”
“Wait, so you’re saying my breasts might never stop growing?! And there’s nothing we can do?”
“No. I can’t ascertain what the future holds. We don’t know what caused your breasts to stop growing three years ago. We can reasonably expect your current growth to come to an end as well. The question is whether that remission will be permanent and when your condition will go into remission.”
“So basically, I’m fucked. My life is over.”
“Hailey, I know the situation seems very dire right now. But let’s not jump to conclusions.”
“What the fuck do you know? You’re not the one with these giant things stuck to your chest! You can say that because you don’t have to live with gigantic breasts that might never stop growing. I don’t give a fuck what might happen or might not happen. All that matters is this is happening to me and you were always a useless piece of shit. Why do you even call yourself a doctor? Go fuck yourself, Eric. Get the fuck-”
“Hailey! That’s enough!” Mrs. Miklosovic interjected. “Doctor, I’m so sorry Hailey is taking it all out on you. Please understand and accept my apology on my daughter’s behalf.”
“It’s perfectly understandable, Mrs. Miklosovic. Don’t worry about it. I think I should leave now and give you and your daughter some room.” Dr. Prince spoke as he got up and started walking to the door.
“Yeah, get the fuck out of my room.” Hailey yelled at Dr. Prince as he left the room accompanied by her mom.
Hailey didn’t even know why she was lashing out at Dr. Prince. As soon as the door closed, her fury turned into numbness. She didn’t even know what to think or feel. Her world had just been turned upside down and there was nothing she could do to change it. Minutes passed as Hailey stared blankly at the ceiling -- that is, until her nipples began to flare up yet again!

User:LX

2017-08-03T01:31:27Z

89.31.57.5:

Hailey looked at her phone to see who was calling. It was her boyfriend, Sandy. She knew she had to pick up. Sandy was sprinting from wherever he was to get her.
“Hello?” Hailey spoke in a shaking voice.
“So you’re in the second floor bathroom?” Sandy asked as he swiped into Uder Hall.
“Yeah, I’ll come out.”
“Okay, I’ll see you.” Sandy hung up while leaping up the stairs.
Before getting out of the bathroom, Hailey took a last look in the mirror to adjust her bra. Although her breasts spilled over the bra no matter how hard she shoved them in, Hailey’s baggy shirt concealed the bulges rather well. She had not decided whether to tell Sandy about the growth episode that just happened. So, it was best for Sandy to not notice anything for the time being.
As soon as Hailey opened the bathroom door, she was startlingly pulled into Sandy’s tight embrace. Sandy had always been physically affectionate. But Hailey didn’t know Sandy would be standing right behind the door and hug her the second she opened the door. Hailey’s breasts hurt as they were still tender from the intense eight-hour growth spurt. Her nipples hurt especially. But she didn’t care. She was too happy to be in Sandy’s arms.
“Are you okay?” Sandy softly whispered into Hailey’s ear.
“Can we just go back? I just wanna sleep.” Hailey replied as she felt tears gathering in her eyes.
“Of course. We can talk whenever you feel comfortable.”
On their walk back, Hailey’s erect nipples kept hurting from chafing against her bra. It felt as if someone was scraping her nipples with sandpaper. Her breasts also hurt as they quivered. Because of their weight and firmness, they did not jiggle per se. But even the slightest movement in her breasts caused her pain as they were still extremely tender from the eight-hour growth spurt. As a result, although their dorm was only two minutes away, Hailey could not bear the pain any longer.
“Sandy, can we just rest here for a bit?” Hailey asked.
“Yeah, of course!” Sandy replied.
“Thank you. I’m sorry about all this.” Hailey spoke as she sat on a nearby bench.
“Are you kidding? There’s nothing for you to feel sorry about.” Sandy kissed Hailey on the forehead before sitting next to her. “You wanna just lie down and rest your head in my lap?”
“No, it’s okay.” Hailey actually did want to lie down. It’s just that she couldn’t with her bra on. When she lied on her back braless, Hailey’s breasts sprawled out to each side of her torso. Although her spilled breasts forced Hailey to have her arms point out or upwards, they did not exert any weight on her. But with a bra on, her breasts would rest atop her torso. And because their combined weight comfortably exceeded sixteen pounds, they felt like bricks crushing into her chest.
Lying down on her side or her front was out of the question as well. Because her breasts still felt excruciatingly sore, putting any weight on them was not an option – whether it was the breast on top squishing the breast below or her entire upper body crushing down on both breasts.
“Can I sleep with you tonight?” Hailey asked. They always slept together on the weekends but never on week days. So Sandy was caught off guard as it was only Wednesday.
“You sure? I mean if you want to, I’m happy with that.” Sandy replied.
“Yeah, I think it’ll make me feel better.”
Hailey undressed the second she and Sandy got into his single room. A warm shower was the only thing on her mind. She grabbed Sandy’s towel, wrapped it around her, and headed straight to the communal floor bathroom. Without her bra on, Hailey’s breasts wobbled uncomfortably under the towel as she walked. Her nipples also poked through conspicuously. Anyone from ten yards away could spot them. But worst of all, her breasts sagged like nobody’s business. In fact, Hailey looked more like a pregnant woman than someone with obscenely huge breasts.
If Hailey had been going to the shower from her room, she would have worn a bra and a bathrobe over it, avoiding all these issues. But Hailey didn’t have the energy to deal with her roommates who would no doubt ask her questions out of worries. As much as she appreciated their concerns, Hailey needed to process her situation first before talking to anyone about it.
When Hailey got back from the shower, Sandy was already sound asleep. She then quietly put on one of Sandy’s t-shirt and got into bed. And since she didn’t have any clean panties to wear, Sandy’s t-shirt was all she wore. Hailey felt awkward but didn’t really care. She thought, ‘I mean at this point, does it even matter? Sandy’s seen my pussy like a hundred times. He’s also fingered me multiple times.’
As exhausted as she was, Hailey had trouble falling asleep with so much on her mind: ‘Should I even go to class tomorrow? What if there’s another growth attack? But then I can’t really miss class because I need a 4.0 to stay on the scholarship. Or, I should go to Student Health Center tomorrow morning! Yeah that way, I won’t be marked down for absence. But who cares about scholarships if my breasts make school impossible? Oh my god, that won’t happen, would it!?’
Eventually, the exhaustion overtook her and she fell asleep. But after an hour or so, Hailey woke up from a tingling sensation in her nipples. In a matter of seconds, the sensation spread to her entire breasts. It felt as if the insides of her breasts were twitching and expanding at the same time. Hailey could actually feel her breasts swelling and growing. With all the blood gushing in, they started to heat up. She felt dizzy and nauseous from the intense throbbing. In fact, when Hailey gently put her hands on her breasts, she could feel her blood pulsing through them. With every pulse, an orgasmic sensation rippled from the nipples to her entire breasts. There was no doubt in Hailey’s mind. She was about to undergo the most aggressive growth spurt she had ever experienced.
Hailey could not help but moan from the wave of orgasms cresting ever more strongly. She tried to hold it in, fearing she might wake up Sandy. But it was no use.
“What are you doing?” Half-asleep and confused, Sandy asked Hailey.
“I can’t…” Hailey struggled to speak.
“You can’t what?”
“Get me wet (indistinct).”
“Get you wet? You want to?” Sandy inquired as he positioned himself to suck Hailey’s nipples.
“Wet (indistinct).”
Taking her reply as a “yes,” Sandy gave Hailey’s nipple a light kiss. Her nipple was already hard and incredibly warm. It aroused him.
“Ah!” Hailey shrieked from an orgasmic sensation from her nipple overflooding her entire body.
Although Sandy was surprised to see Hailey react so strongly, it nevertheless turned him on. He gentled rolled her nipple with his tongue. To Sandy’s dismay, Hailey was silent. She was still too. Sandy gently shook Hailey to see if she was messing with him. But still, there was no response. Convinced that Hailey was playing a trick on him, Sandy started to suck her nipple. Again, Hailey wasn’t responsive. ‘Oh damn it! She must have been sleep-talking. That’s probably why she was slurring her words. I can’t believe I got hard from her just sleep-talking,’ Sandy thought to himself, ‘I wonder if Hailey knows she sleep-talks. I should ask her tomorrow during lunch.’
Of course, Hailey was not sleep-talking. She had been fully awake the whole time until she passed out the instant Sandy rolled her nipple with his tongue. Hailey was in fact trying to tell Sandy to get her wet towels she could use to cool down her breasts during the growth spurt.
When Hailey regained her consciousness, she found herself alone in Sandy’s room. Hailey was beyond confused: ‘Why am I in Sandy’s room? Is it the weekend already? Wait, there’s no way because I definitely went to class yesterday. What happened then? Did I just come over and pass out? Wait, then why is it dark outside? I should just check the time.’
As she got out of bed to get her phone, Hailey sensed a definite change. Her breasts felt noticeably heavier. Then it hit her: ‘Oh my god! That’s right, I remember now. I had a growth spurt during the day and another one at night. I must have fainted last night when the growth attack became too much for me to take. How much did they grow?!’
Hailey lifted her breasts with her hands to feel their weight. They felt markedly heavier. ‘Shit! I’m so screwed! Will they even fit into my bra anymore?!’ Hailey hurriedly put on her bra to see how adequately or inadequately the cups would contain her breasts. It was beyond clear. Her breasts were now at least two cup sizes larger. They were spilling all over the top and to the sides. In fact, the spillage at the front was so pronounced that it looked like she had four breasts.
Even Hailey’s baggy shirt failed to conceal the enormous spillage at the front. No matter how hard she stuffed her breasts in to her bra, it clearly showed through the shirt.
‘What the fuck am I going to do? I can’t walk around like this! Not without a newly fitted bra. But I won’t be able to get fitted for a new bra until I go back home this weekend. And I won’t have the new bras until next weekend. And more importantly, I should see Dr. Prince as soon as possible to stop all this.’ Hailey picked up her phone to call her mom. There was no other choice. She would have to go home and skip school until her new bras arrived.
“Hello?” Her mom answered
“Mom, you have to pick me up right now.”
“Hailey, what are you talking about? We said I’d pick you up on Friday. It’s only Wednesday.”
“I know, Mom. It can’t wait. I need to get fitted for a new bra as soon as possible!”
“Why? What happened?”
“They grew. They don’t fit in my bra anymore.”
“Wait, are you sure? I mean, don’t they get a bit fuller a week before your period?”
“Yes, I’m sure! And it’s still two weeks till my period. I’m telling you my breasts grew yesterday. During the day and overnight. I fainted during the growth spurt last night and when I woke up it was ten o’clock.”
“Oh… how bad was it?”
“Pretty bad. Actually, it’s really bad. Mom, we can talk later. Just come pick me up right now.”
“Okay, if that’s what you think is best. I’ll call you when I’m there.” Her mom hung up.
There were dozens of unread text messages on Hailey’s phone. But she had no intention of reading them. She knew half of them would be from Sandy asking her if she was okay and the other half would be from her friends asking the very same question. The truth was she was not okay; her breasts, after three years of not growing, underwent two aggressive growth spurts in a day. Although her birth control was a likeable cause, she had no idea what actually prompted those growth attacks. And worst of all, she didn’t know if there was more growth to come.
Hailey quickly finished packing and anxiously waited for her mom to arrive. She prayed to God that neither of her roommates would walk in. Kate and Emily were great friends. But Hailey just really needed to be alone. Besides, she was not at all ready to disclose the details of her medical condition. Luckily, her phone rang much sooner than expected.
When Hailey got back home, she felt so relieved. At least for now, she didn’t have to worry about her ill-fitting bras. Her family knew Hailey suffered from gigantomastia. No one would think her as being indecent or promiscuous. In fact, they all knew how she had to contend with her breasts constantly outgrowing her bras during high school. She even felt comfortable enough with her mom and younger sister to be braless around them. Nevertheless, she couldn’t help but feel awkward about her oversized breasts with her father and brothers.
In fact, she could still vividly recall one particularly embarrassing incident with her older brother Sean. It happened when Sean was driving Hailey back home from her high school choir concert. As Sean drove over a nasty pothole, the jolt caused Hailey’s blouse to pop open. The top four buttons flung away as Hailey’s ample cleavage came busting out. Had the blouse not been so tight, it might have never popped open. Unfortunately, it was as tight as it could be with Hailey’s breasts having grown two cup sizes from 32H to 32K since she got the blouse tailored.
Nothing inappropriate transpired in the car. Sean only caught a glimpse when one of the buttons hit him and he turned to see what had just happened. Hailey also quickly covered her exposed cleavage with her hands. Still, the very fact that Hailey’s breasts were now so big that a pothole could cause them to bust open made Sean and Hailey beyond uncomfortable. They didn’t talk the rest of the drive home and ended up avoiding each other for days after.
As embarrassing as the pothole incident was, it paled in comparison to when Hailey’s dad was nurse her. During the winter of her senior year in high school, Hailey came down with a vicious flu. She could hardly feed herself let alone get out of bed. And to make matters worse, Hailey’s mom caught the flu from Hailey as she nursed her. So the responsibility of taking care of Hailey fell on to Mr. Miklosovic.
Like any father with a teenage daughter, Mr. Miklosovic knocked before entering to make sure it was okay for him to come inside. Mr. Miklosovic was fully aware of how insecure and self-conscious Hailey felt about her breasts. So he was determined to not say or do anything unwittingly to make her feel worse. What Mr. Miklosovic didn’t know was just how much her breasts sprawled out to each side of her torso when lying on her back. Why would he?
Mr. Miklosovic sat on Hailey’s bed to give her some water. But Hailey wasn’t strong enough to get up and drink the water herself. In fact, she could barely speak. So Mr. Miklosovic leaned on his left arm as he held a glass of water close to Hailey’s lips with his right hand. But instead of drinking, Hailey squeezed out a barely audible noise. It sounded like she was in pain. It was right then Mr. Miklosovic realized his left hand was pushing down on Hailey’s breast. He hadn’t noticed because Hailey was all tucked in and her breasts were under the covers.
Because she was so sick, Hailey didn’t have the clearest memory of the incident. All she remembered was that someone accidentally pushed down on her breast quite painfully. Hailey figured it must have her younger sister Lily while she was trying to checking in on her. As sweet and caring as she was, Lily was quite clumsy and prone to hurting others and herself. Hailey only found out that it was actually her dad when he apologized after she got better. She wished her dad hadn’t told her as the revelation made her awkward relationship with her dad even worse.
Hailey kissed her mom goodnight and went to her room. As she brushed her teeth to get ready for bed, Hailey became nervous of what diagnosis she would get from Dr. Prince. She had been seeing Dr. Prince since the onset of gigantomastia and she was slated for an appointment tomorrow. Although he couldn’t stop her growth, Hailey appreciated Dr. Prince gave his best. He was also able to prescribe some medications that got her through some severe growth attacks. Now she would be hearing from him what was behind her last two growth spurts and if they would continue at his office tomorrow.
“Hi, Hailey. It’s nice to see you again. How have you been?” Dr. Prince greeted Hailey as she walked in.
“Hi, Dr. Prince. I’ve been good. Thanks for asking.”
“So I heard from your mom that you underwent two aggressive growth spurts in a span of a day. Am I correct?”
“Yeah. The first one lasted about eight hours. It started at like three in the afternoon. And then the second attack came later that night. I don’t know how long it lasted because it became too intense and I ended up fainting. When I woke up, it was the night after…”
“And I’m assuming that you’re spilling out of your bra from those two growth spurts?”
“Yeah. I think they grew up about three two sizes. I haven’t gotten measured yet though. And they feel much heavier. Much heavier. Like I can just feel it.”
“I see. That’s a lot of growth from just two growth spurts. Could you take off your clothes for me? I want to make sure you didn’t develop any lumps and see how your skin is handling all this growth.” Hailey pulled over her shirt and unhooked her bra.
“My skin does feel pretty stretched. And my nipples and areolas feel extremely raw.”
“Well at least it doesn’t look like you developed any lumps. So that’s certainly a positive.” Dr. Prince spoke as he felt Hailey’s breasts her possible lumps. “Now, how are your breasts feeling? Are they feeling okay?”
“It’s tolerable. Like they feel really full and tender. But it doesn’t cause too much pain to walk around and do other things.”
“That’s good. I’m going to weigh your breasts to see how much your breasts actually grew. That way, we can ascertain what kind of situation we’re dealing with.” Dr. Prince lifted the scale from the floor onto his desk. He then proceeded to gently weigh Hailey’s breasts. The left breast weighed 10.12 pounds and the right breast weighed 9.94 pounds for a total of 20.06 pounds. “Do you remember how much they weighed the last time, Hailey?”
“I think they weighed just under seventeen pounds combined.” Hailey replied.
“So that comes down to about 1.5 pounds worth of growth per breast. We shouldn’t panic. But this isn’t a good indicator either. And you can’t put back on your clothes now.” Dr. Prince remarked as he sifted through some records. “This is actually the most aggressive it’s ever been.”
“Wait, no way! I mean the growth attacks did feel intense. But they didn’t feel as bad as back then. Are you sure?” Hailey rebutted as she put on her clothes.
“The bulk of your growth could have happened while you were out. Were you prescribed any hormonal medication recently?”
“Yes. Birth control. Estrogen-based.”
“I wish you had consulted me before doing something like that. Hailey, you shouldn’t be taking your condition lightly. I know it’s hard for you. I know it’s unfair. But you have to be extra careful due to your history.”
“I’m sorry, Dr. Prince! I needed to get on the pill and I just got them prescribed at the school clinic. Since I didn’t experience any growth for three years, I thought it would be okay…”
“Did you not inform the doctor that you suffer from gigantomastia?”
“No… I know I should have but I felt uncomfortable talking about it. She told me the increased estrogen levels might cause my breasts to get a little bigger. But that would be it. I really didn’t think it would matter.”
“No need to apologize, Hailey. Just consult with me beforehand for any medication or treatment that could affect your hormones. How long have you been taking the pill?”
“Just for six weeks. I stopped the day they started growing again. Dr. Prince, are they going to keep growing because of this? Isn’t there a way to stop the growth? Wouldn’t stopping the pill stop the growth?”
“I can’t give you any specific answers right now. But my conjecture would be that as your estrogen level decreases, your breasts would most likely not experience further growth. Let’s just wait a week or so. And if there are any more growth episodes, we’ll prescribe you some progesterone to lower your estrogen levels and see if that stops the growth. Let me just take a blood sample to see where your hormone levels are at. We can discuss them later next week.”
Hailey got back into her car to drive home from the clinic. Sitting in the car, she could not stop beating herself up for being so careless. ‘Why the fuck did I take birth control?! That was so stupid of me. Using condoms would have been enough.’ Hailey looked at her phone and saw that now there were thirty-six unread text messages and eleven missed calls. She felt bad but she was in no state of mind to explain or deflect on her current turmoil.
When Hailey got back home, her younger brother Jamie was in the backyard playing catch with a friend. After saying hi, Hailey went upstairs to her room to calm herself down. However, alone in her room with her thoughts, she grew more agitated. So she just tried watching her brother and his friend play catch. It wasn’t fun to watch, but it certainly did calm her down. The fact that Jamie’s friend looked cute didn’t hurt either.
Now that she was calm, Hailey wanted to take a warm bath. Every once in a while, she enjoyed relaxing in the tub to melt away her worries albeit temporarily. In fact, one of the things she missed the most away from home was the warm bath. Hailey undressed and put on her bathrobe. Her nipples poked through the bathrobe unabashedly. Hailey usually wore a bra underneath so that her nipples didn’t show through. But when no one was home or awake, she didn’t really bother. And because Jamie was outside playing catch with his friend, Hailey went to the bathroom with just her bathrobe on.
As she waited for the hot water to fill the tub, Hailey carefully looked at her bare breasts in the mirror. They certainly looked bigger than two days ago. Her breasts were now partially blocking her arms because they were so full and pushing each other to the sides. She couldn’t believe that her chest had once been completely flat. She could hardly remember how she looked back then. Her puffy nipples and areolas were all that was female about her chest. Curious to see how much her breasts would protrude to the side from the back, Hailey turned her back on the mirror. As she lifted her arms up to see how much of her breasts would show from behind, something else happened: Jamie’s friend walked in on Hailey! For a split second, they were face to face as Hailey stood naked with her arms up. Hailey shrieked.
“Oh shit! I’m so sorry.” Jamie’s friend exclaimed as he shut the door while looking away. “I had no idea someone was in there.”
“I’m sorry too. I forgot to lock the door. It’s okay, really.” Hailey replied.
“Wait, what’s going on!?” Jamie asked as he came running upstairs.
“Don’t get mad but I-uh-ended up walking in on your sister.” Jamie’s friend spoke all flustered.
“What the fuck, Greg!?” Jamie rebuked.
“It was my fault. I forgot to lock the door.” Hailey defended Greg as she quickly put on her bathrobe and opened the door. Knowing how hot-tempered Jamie could be sometimes, Hailey knew she had to deescalate the situation. “Jamie, I’m sure it was an honest mistake.”
“Why the fuck would you go in the bathroom when the door was closed? Didn’t you know my sister was home? What the fuck were you thinking?” Jamie edged in on Greg.
“Jamie, I really didn’t know your sister would be in there. Why would I do-” Before Greg could finish his sentence, Jamie punched him in the face. Greg fell to the floor as blood splattered all over.
“Are you okay?!” Hailey rushed to Greg’s side to help him get up.
“Dude, what the fuck!” Greg bellowed.
“That’s what you get.” Jamie taunted.
“Go fuck yourself, Jamie.” Greg hit back, brushing himself off.
“Yeah, just get the fuck out of my house.”
After spitting on the floor, Greg stormed downstairs.
“Jamie, what was that?! You should go apologize right now!” Hailey berated rather harshly.
“It’s not my fault.” Jamie stonewalled.
“Well if you’re not, I am.” Hailey rushed downstairs to catch Greg. Although it was her brother who hit him, she felt responsible for the incident. If she had simply locked the bathroom door, none of this would have happened. Just as Greg was about to get into his car, Hailey was able to call out to him from the front door. Greg looked her way.
“Are you okay? I’m so sorry.” Hailey spoke as she approached Greg with her arms crossed. She knew full well how much her breasts wobbled without a bra. By crossing her arms, Hailey could subtly push down on her breasts to minimize the movement. Of course, Hailey also knew very well that her nipples were very prominently poking through the bathrobe. But the only way to conceal them would have been to cup her nipples with her hands, which would have called too much attention to her breasts. Had she not been in a rush to catch Greg for an apology, Hailey would have gotten into a proper attire. But not knowing his number or address, she couldn’t afford to miss him. It was in Hailey’s nature to apologize on the spot.
“No, it’s not your fault. And I’ll be alright.” Greg replied.
“Things just got out of hand so fast. Jamie is such a hothead. I’m really sorry… Are you sure okay? Would you like me to take you to the hospital?”
“No, no, no. Really, it’s nothing. It’s just a bruise. It’ll go away in two weeks or so. And I really should be the one that’s apologizing. At my house, we always have the bathroom doors closed. So I just assumed no one would be in there without really thinking. I’m really sorry for walking in on you like that. And if it makes you feel any better, I couldn’t really see anything. Not that I would’ve if I could.”
“Don’t worry about it. It was an honest mistake.” Although Hailey acted cool, she was mortified inside. She knew Greg could not have really seen much. But she was also confident that he must have caught a glimpse of her breasts. Thinking back to that split second, Hailey was overcome with an unshakeable sense of shame; she felt ashamed of how freakish her breasts were and became terrified that Greg might see her as nothing but a freak. As a defense mechanism against that fear, her self-deprecating humor kicked in: “I know they’re really ugly. I’m glad they didn’t make you blind or something.”
“What?” Greg knew Hailey was referring to her breasts. But not knowing what the appropriate thing to say would be, Greg pretended to be confused.
“Never mind. It’s nothing. Are you sure you can drive right now?” Quickly realizing what a gaffe she had made, Hailey changed the subject. But not before catching Greg take a quick glance at her breasts. His glance made Hailey even more conscious of her nipples showing through, but she only had herself to blame for bringing up the subject.
“Yeah. It’s no problem. Well thanks for checking in on me. I should get going now.”
“Okay, bye.”
After waving Greg off, Hailey went back into the house. She cringed at her joke that in hindsight was wholly inappropriate and in poor taste. From time to time, Hailey had a habit of spitting out words that she instantly regretted. This was one of them.
When Hailey got back to the bathroom, the water in the tub had gotten lukewarm. And as she refilled the tub with hot water, Hailey again turned her back on the mirror with her arms up. And to Hailey’s dismay, the sides of her breasts protruded rather prominently. She couldn’t believe just how much of her breasts could now be seen from the back. And her thin waist only worked to exaggerate the protrusion to the sides. Turning back to face the mirror, Hailey began to remember the times when her breasts weren’t as large.
‘And I thought my boobs were too big when they only sagged to my belly button… At least back then my front wasn’t all boobs. Now they completely cover my belly and droop down to my hips. I can’t believe I thought mom’s boobs were too huge at 34E. I’d give anything to be an E cup right now. Actually, I’d grateful if I could just be a 32G. Like that’s all I ask.’
Noticing that the tub was almost full, Hailey turned the knob and got in. It was so warm and relaxing. Her breasts floated rather comically. No matter how many times Hailey saw her breasts float during a bath, she always found it funny. It also served as a stark reminder to never go swimming in public.
After relaxing in the bath for half an hour or so, Hailey got up and turned on the shower. But as the water hit her, she felt an intense sharp pain in her nipples. It felt as if someone just jabbed her nipples with a blunted blade. Hailey turned off the shower immediately but the pain still lingered. Right after a growth spurt, Hailey always avoided showers because her nipples were too sensitive to take it. But since it had been a day since her last growth attack, Hailey just assumed it would be okay. Obviously, she was mistaken. ‘I guess I’ll just take a shower later tonight. I can’t believe my nipples are still this tender,’ Hailey thought to herself as she put on her bathrobe and went to her room.
Still relaxed from her thirty-minute bath, Hailey collapsed on her bed. She was ready for a nap. And before she knew it, she fell asleep.
Hailey could not have been napping for more than an hour when a sudden burning sensation in her breasts woke her. The sensation was so intense that Hailey could have sworn that her breasts were literally on fire. They also throbbed violently. It was as if her heart was pumping all of her blood into her breasts and nowhere else. Not only did she feel light-headed, but she was also experiencing shortness of breath. Soon a tingling sensation emerged, rippling from the tip of her nipples to her entire breasts. ‘Oh no, not again…’ Overwhelmed with all the sensation, Hailey passed out.

User:Rachelyra

2017-08-03T01:29:41Z

89.31.57.5:

As Hailey reached for the toothpaste, she felt the cold ceramic of the sink lightly brushing against her breasts. She squirmed instantly from the unpleasant sensation. Even though she was wearing a baggy t-shirt, her breasts lifted the front so much that it failed to cover the bottom of her breasts. A bra would have prevented this mishap, but Hailey wasn’t wearing one. Why would she? Although she was in the communal floor bathroom of her college dorm, no one else could possibly be awake at four fifty in the morning. Hailey had never stayed up this late either as a matter of fact; it’s just that she had to finish an eight-page paper due at ten that very morning. Despite her exhaustion, Hailey felt relieved and triumphant that the paper was finished — that is, until her breasts somehow ended up brushing against the sink for the very first time.
Shame and disbelief overtook her: ‘Have my boobs gotten bigger? This can’t be happening! They pretty much stopped growing the sophomore year of high school. It’s been three years since then. Or did I somehow bend my back just now!?’ With her mind racing in ten different directions, Hailey stood upright and slowly hunched to see what would happen. And there she had it: her breasts lightly touching the sink at her most natural posture; her breasts were growing again.
Overwhelmed by the realization, Hailey rushed to her room to scour the Internet for an explanation. ‘How could this be!? My boobs stopped growing like three years ago! What is going on!?’ But then something dawned on her: she just started taking birth control for the first time. Hailey remembered the doctor telling her that the pill could slightly make her breasts bigger as a side effect. As undesirable as the side effect was, Hailey had no choice because practicing safe sex was of utmost importance to her.
Hailey and her boyfriend, Sandy, had been dating for three months now and Hailey was finally ready to lose her virginity. She loved him and nobody had made her feel so safe in her life. Sandy always listened with an open heart and spoke with such confidence. Simply put, Sandy was the boyfriend Hailey had always dreamt about during high school. In fact, she was more than ready to take the relationship to the next step.
With an explanation for her sudden breast growth, Hailey could not help but chuckle at just how much she was freaking out. ‘Thank God my roommates are asleep. Otherwise it would have been pretty embarrassing,’ she thought to herself as she got into her bed. It was now five o’clock in the morning and she only had four hours to sleep before going to her history class to turn in her paper.
When Hailey woke up, she knew instantly she was late for her history class. Her roommates, Kate and Emily, were gone. If she had woken up on time, Kate and Emily would be chatting in the room as they always do before leaving for their writing class. She grabbed her phone to see if she could at least make it to class before it would end. It was a quarter to eleven, which was when class ended. If she ran, she would make it by the end of class to turn in her paper, avoiding a late penalty.
She ransacked her drawers to get dressed as quickly as possible except there was just one problem: she was out of clean panties. However, it did not matter. Hailey was determined to turn in her paper on time no matter what and decided to do without underwear for the day. Besides, her period was two weeks away. There was nothing to worry about. So, in her typical spring attire – yoga pants with a loose shirt – Hailey bolted out of her room.
Hailey ran as fast as she could. The history classroom was ten minutes away from her dorm. She could not afford to slow down. Unfortunately, Hailey’s breasts made it rather painful and downright embarrassing. Hailey was a 32N and each of her breasts weighed at least eight pounds. Her bra could do not adequately contain them let alone constrain the wild movement. They bounced up and down, side to side, and front and back. If it weren’t for their weight, Hailey’s breasts would have slapped her in the face with every bounce. But it was also the crushing weight that made it not just unpleasant but also painful. Every bounce sent a jolt throughout her breasts, making them tremble with unforgiving intensity.
And as baggy as her shirt was, it was painfully obvious to everyone else how Hailey’s breasts were bouncing out of control. Her petite figure only worked to accentuate the movement. Of course, Hailey was well aware of how ridiculous she looked. In fact, she was blushing scarlet red from the unwanted attention. Hailey wished for the millionth time that her breasts weren’t so large.
It was eleven sharp when she finally arrived at the classroom. Professor Valentina hadn’t dismissed the class yet. Hailey snuck in through the back door and turned in her paper with relief.
Still out of breath, Hailey started walking to her acting class. She’d been told countless times that she had the looks of a 1950s Hollywood starlet and that she should seriously consider a career in acting. However, Hailey was never convinced that she had the talent for it. Nevertheless, she still enjoyed acting in a class setting or in a school play. Today, however, Hailey felt tempted to skip since she had gotten so little sleep. If there was one thing Hailey could never give up in life, it was sleep. If she skipped acting and went back to her dorm, she could nap till her astronomy class at two thirty. Hailey felt bad but decided to skip her acting class.
The entire walk back to her dorm, Hailey was terribly guilt-ridden. But the moment she opened the door to her room and saw her bed, all that guilt dissipated. She didn’t even bother changing into her sleeping clothes – loose t-shirt with shorts – because she was too exhausted. She just took off her bra and got into bed for some shuteye.
Unfortunately, Hailey couldn’t fall asleep or get any rest for that matter. As she was getting comfy in bed, a strong tingling sensation in her breasts suddenly came on. It was as if her breasts had fallen asleep. Hard. Her mind went numb from the pain. The sensation persisted for about half an hour.
Strangely enough, this was not a new experience for Hailey. At thirteen, she fell victim to medical condition called “virginal breast hypertrophy,” undergoing excessive breast growth. Within a span of two years, Hailey went from wearing training bras to wearing 32M bras. Before every growth attack, she would experience a strong tingling sensation in her breasts. A growth attack would last anywhere from several hours to weeks. During her most aggressive growth spurt, Hailey’s breasts ballooned up from a 32D to a 32H in less than two weeks. They also grew gradually even when she wasn’t having a growth attack. But that was “negligible” compared to how much she’d grow during a growth spurt. Thankfully her breasts stopped growing after the sophomore year of high school, and they remained pretty much the same size since then. Now it seemed, however, her breasts might start growing again.
Panic seized her: ‘What if my breasts start growing and never stop this time? What if this time, the growth attacks are more aggressive? Will I need to drop out of college? How big will my breasts be? What if they become so heavy that I can barely walk? Will I become bed-ridden?’ Hailey tried not to jump to conclusions without first seeing a doctor. But she could not stop picturing the most unfortunate outcomes. As soon as the tingling sensation went away, Hailey got out of bed and called her mom.
“Hello?” Her mom picked up.
“Hi Mom, it’s me.”
“I knew it! I knew my daughter was missing me just as much as I missed her. So, what’s my little Hailey been up to?”
“Mom, listen… I think it’s starting again.”
“What’s starting again?”
“My condition. I think they’re starting to grow again, my breasts.”
“What do you mean? That’s not possible.”
“No, I’m serious. I just experienced the same tingling sensation from way back then.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course I’m sure, Mom! Why aren’t you taking this seriously?!”
“I’m sorry sweetie, I didn’t mean it that way. It’s just—has there been any growth yet?”
“No, not yet. But I think it’s only a matter of time.”
“Well, try to stay calm for now, okay? I’ll come down and get you this weekend. And we can go see Dr. Prince and see what we can do. Alright?”
“It’s not like he was of any help last time.”
“I know, Hailey, I know. But it’s the best option we have. Stay strong for mommy, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Good! That’s my girl. Well, mommy’s gotta get back to work now. Love you.”
“Okay, bye.”
After hanging up, Hailey took off her shirt and blankly stared into Emily’s full body mirror. She saw a girl with ridiculously large breasts. The girl’s breasts revolted her. But she also knew that very girl was her. There was no denying it. Those pendulous breasts in the mirror were the same breasts hanging from her own chest, sagging down to her hips and pushing each other to the sides. They engulfed her entire torso. The skin had so many wrinkles and stretch marks, making her breasts look like those of a fifty-year-old woman.
To top it off, her nipples and areolas were freakishly large. They had grown proportionally to the rest of her breasts, which is precisely why they were so huge. However, the light pink hue of the nipples and the areolas gave them a shy, apologetic presence. Now Hailey’s panic slowly turned into rage. She began to ask herself again and again, ‘Why me? Why me!?’ It had been a while since she deliberately looked at her bare breasts with such contempt. The shame and anger she once felt about her breasts came roaring back.
‘Look at how big my breasts are. If only I could wake up tomorrow and they were completely gone… I must look like a total freak wherever I go. They’re so large that they don’t even make me look feminine. God, I feel like some monster. I wonder what it’s like to not worry about how freaky your boobs look every minute you’re out in public. And these nipples are so huge. There’s no way anyone can actually find me physical attractive. Like even Sandy probably doesn’t although I hope he does because he’s my boyfriend.’
The more Hailey looked at her breasts in the mirror, the more shameful and angry she became. Her most humiliating and enraging memories came screaming back. Hailey’s face started to turn scarlet red as she remembered that time when her bra strap snapped in the middle of a scene during her high school play. Hailey was wearing a tight shirt for her role. Literally everyone – from her best friends to her parents – in the audience could see her right breast lose support and conspicuously sag to her belly. There were gasps and giggles among the crowd. But Hailey managed to smile it off and finish the scene.
As soon as the scene was over, Hailey rushed backstage in tears, not knowing what to do for her upcoming scenes. Going braless was not an option since then her oversized nipples would show through. They were no smaller than a quarter and protruded as much as three quarters of an inch. Also, Hailey had no intention of letting the world see just how much her breasts sagged due to their sheer weight and size. Borrowing a bra would not work either. Although she was only a freshman in high school, her size was a whopping 32J. Besides, even if Hailey managed to find someone with the same size, who in their right mind would lend her their bra?
Her fellow cast members did their best to console her, but all fell short of offering a solution. In the end, Hailey was forced to perform the rest of her scenes with lopsided breasts. Needless to say, her performance suffered. It was a miracle that Hailey didn’t forget her lines. After getting home that night, Hailey screamed and cried into her pillow till sunrise. Although it was four years ago, Hailey could still feel her right breast plunge and hear the gasps and the giggles in the audience. She felt just as humiliated from merely remembering that night.
Another incident that came screaming back was the time when she got fitted for a custom bra. Hailey had just outgrown her 32L bras and it was again time to get measured for a new size. Getting fitted for a custom bra was nothing new for Hailey. In fact, this was to be her seventh time. But she loathed the whole experience of getting fitted nonetheless.
As a sophomore in high school, Hailey was as insecure about her breasts as any girl could possibly be. At that age, every girl of any size felt insecure. If you were below a C cup, your breasts weren’t big enough. If you were larger than an E cup, your breasts were too big and saggy, making you look heavier than ideal. And if you were indeed endowed with the “right” cup size – C or D, you would find problems with the shape. It was no wonder why Hailey did not like getting fitted. The mere thought of a bra fitter seeing and touching her bare breasts made her stomach knot. No matter how polite and professional the bra fitter was, Hailey was choked with humiliation when the fitter would see and touch her bare breasts. Perhaps if her breasts weren’t so large and pendulous, Hailey would have found the experience infinitely more tolerable. But that was not the case.
Hailey’s breasts obscenely heaved at the middle and rudely sagged at the bottom. Due to their sheer size, Hailey’s breasts had a pendulous shape despite being extremely full. As a result, her bust was the fullest around her waist and bottomed out just above her hips. It was also around this time that the outer edges of her breasts started touching her arms as they pushed each other to the sides. In short, Hailey’s breasts came nothing close to the “ideal” breasts you saw on television and in the movies. It was only natural for Hailey to not want anyone else, let alone an utter stranger, see and touch her breasts. Of course, all the taunts and ridicules she endured at school for her outlandishly sized breasts did not help.
The only consolation Hailey had as her mom drove her to get fitted was the fact that she was starting to feel more comfortable with the bra fitter. Ariana was a great conversationalist and Hailey genuinely enjoyed chatting with her. Ariana was like the cool aunt Hailey always wanted. It also helped that Ariana too had large breasts. They were not as huge as Hailey’s but 34F was no moderate size either. Unfortunately, when Hailey and her mom walked into the store, they were told Ariana had been in a car accident and that she wouldn’t be back at work a while. A woman in her late twenties by the name of Sasha was to cover Ariana’s shifts for the time being.
Unlike Ariana, Sasha didn’t let Hailey get ready in private by waiting outside the fitting room. Instead, Sasha came into the fitting room with Hailey, expecting her to take off her shirt and bra as she stood by. Hailey asked Sasha if she could wait outside only to hear her snap back, “I don’t like to waste my time. Come on, let’s just get it over with. I’m not your mommy.” Sasha’s rudeness irked her, but Hailey asked again politely. Sasha refused with even more irritation this time. Not wanting to make a scene, Hailey took off her shirt and bra and hung them on a rack. She quickly covered her nipples with her hands although her areolas were too big to be fully covered.
“Oh my god! They’re so saggy.” Sasha gibed.
“I know.” Taken aback, Hailey agreed with Sasha.
“No, I mean they’re really saggy. It’s almost hard to believe. And I can still see your areolas by the way.”
“Oh, I’m sorry.” Hailey apologized although she had done nothing wrong. It was not her fault that her nipples were too big to be fully covered by her hands.
“It’s okay. I’m going to see them anyways when I measure your bust.” Sasha replied indifferently as she took out her measuring tape. “I need you to lift up your boobs so I can measure your band size. Right where your breasts fold and meet your chest.”
Hailey hesitated. To lift her breasts, she would have to scoop them up from below. And that meant her nipples would no longer be covered.
“What are you waiting for? I don’t have forever.” Sasha pressed. Hailey complied, eager to be done as quickly as possible. Sasha measured Hailey’s band size but not without making another snide remark. “Jesus, I didn’t even know nipples could be this big. But it makes sense since your tits are so big.”
“If it’s okay with you, I think I’d be more comfortable if you didn’t make comments on my breasts.” Hailey spoke politely, suppressing her ire.
“Fine. Although, it’s not my fault that you feel so uncomfortable with your own tits.” Sasha shot back. “Put your breasts down. I need to measure your bust.”
At this point, Hailey felt tempted to slap Sasha in the face. She had never encountered someone so offensive and confrontational as long as she could remember. Unfortunately, Hailey had always been bad at standing up for herself. So, she swallowed her anger and let her breasts hang from her chest in their natural position. Sasha kept to her word and didn’t make a peep.
However, she became deliberately careless and touchy for the rest of the fitting just to spite Hailey. Whenever Ariana tested a bra’s fit on Hailey, she would adjust and feel the fit very carefully. And each time she had to directly touch Hailey’s breasts for adjustment, she would let her know and only do so gently. Sasha, however, handled Hailey’s breasts roughly and directly touched when it didn’t seem necessary. In fact, Sasha ended up jabbing Hailey’s nipples five times in the process. Each time, the nipple grew more sensitive, making the pain sharper. But of course, Sasha didn’t apologize once. Hailey could not wait to get out of the store. When Sasha was finally done, Hailey got clothed faster than she ever had and stormed out of the fitting room.
As her mom put in the order and made the payment at the counter, Hailey contemplated informing the store manager of what had just happened. But she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Recounting the story would be too humiliating. And she felt pathetic for not having stood up for herself. Before she knew it, Hailey was already in the car, going back home.
“Oh shoot, I’m sorry!” Emily shrieked as she walked into the room and saw Hailey topless. Hailey gasped, realizing she had been topless in their room this whole time as she was lost in self-pity and contempt of her own breasts. Emily went back out immediately after for Hailey to get dressed.
“My bad, Emily. That was totally on me. You can come in now.” Hailey spoke as she collected herself. Emily came back in.
“What were you doing? Were you just changing?”
“No, I mean I was just… never mind. It’s not that important.”
“Are you sure? Because if you were checking for lumps or anything, you should just go to Student Health Center and get examined.”
“It’s nothing like that. I don’t think you’ll understand.”
“Why not?”
“It’s just a very personal issue for me. Like I shouldn’t drag you into it. And I should go to my astronomy class now. I’ll see you later.”
“You do you, Hailey. But just remember I’m always here for you if you need me.”
“I know.” Hailey smiled at Emily as she closed the door behind her.
Hailey could not focus on the lecture no matter how hard she tried. The thought of her breasts growing again terrified her. Although her breasts were abnormally large at 32N, she still lead a normal life. There were many things Hailey wished she had or didn’t have, but she was always grateful for being able to live an ordinary life. But if her breasts start growing again, there was no guarantee what would happen.
Then suddenly, an intense tightening sensation in her nipples overtook her. She couldn’t think straight anymore. The sensation was neither painful nor pleasurable. It was simply overwhelming. It pushed out from her mind any thought or emotion. All she knew was this intense feeling in her nipples. Hailey struggled to keep her breath. Desperate to ease the sensation, Hailey clutched her nipples. But it was no use.
When the feeling of tightness did ease, another sensation took over Hailey’s nipples. Except this time, it was decidedly pleasurable. Hailey could feel her nipples throb, ushering in an unrelenting wave of orgasmic pleasure. With each throb, she climaxed. Hailey had no choice but to bite into her lower lip to keep herself from screaming. All she could do for now was not draw any attention to herself and hope the sensation would subside by the end of class.
After twenty minutes, Hailey’s nipples finally stopped throbbing to her immense relief. Class was about to be dismissed. But Hailey realized she had another problem: her loins and pants were drenched. Hailey had a tendency of becoming excessively lubricated in times of arousal. Whenever she masturbated, she had to put a towel underneath her thighs so that the sheets wouldn’t get ruined. After orgasming in her nipples for twenty straight minutes, Hailey was wetter than she had ever been. And it showed through her grey yoga pants. The entire thigh and butt area was soaked.
Class was dismissed but Hailey remained in her seat, pretending to jog down additional notes. Hailey’s plan was to rush to the bathroom as soon as everyone else left. Then she would remain in a bathroom stall until her pants dried. It would take hours, but there was no other choice.
Hailey broke down in tears as soon as the bathroom stall door locked behind her. So much had happened in the past twelve hours. She could not keep her mind from racing. ‘What just happened to me? Why was I getting all those weird sensations in my nipples? That’s not even the most important question right now. I need to know if my breasts are actually growing again. If my birth control made them bigger, that would be good. Because then I can just stop taking them and my boobs won’t grow. But what if taking birth control triggered my breasts to start growing again? Would that explain why my nipples were feeling so weird just now? Oh my god, what’s gonna happen to me? I should just pray for a peace of mind.’
About half an hour into praying, Hailey could feel her breasts flare up with heat from all the blood rushing in; her worst fear was confirmed. Her breasts were growing again! Although it had been three years since her last growth spurt, Hailey instantly recognized she was about to have a growth spurt. And she knew it would an intense one from how much her breasts were flaring up. “Please be over quickly,” Hailey muttered under her breath with resignation.
Growth spurts not only varied in length but in intensity. When they were relatively mild, Hailey could go about her day without too much distraction. She would never not be aware of the sensations in her breasts. But she could still function. On the other hand, severe growth spurts practically immobilized her. Even the slightest movement exasperated the intense tingling sensation in her breasts to unbearable pain. Her only course of action was to lie in bed and wait it out. She couldn’t do anything as she waited it out in bed either. The sheer intensity of the tingling sensation in her breasts made it possible. Luckily, intense growth attacks tended to be shorter, lasting anywhere from a few hours to several days. All Hailey could do now was pray for this growth attack to pass as soon as possible.
Before the sensations would intensify, Hailey came out of the stall and walked to the paper towel dispenser. She took out at least thirty sheets and soaked them with cold water. As painful as it was to move, she needed them to cool her breasts down. Hailey went back in to the stall and took off her shirt and bra as carefully as possible. Her breasts were already red from all the blood rushing in. Hailey hurriedly put the paper towels on her breasts and sat down on the floor. Now she just had to wait till it was over.
After eight gruesome hours, the tingling sensation in Hailey’s breasts subsided. The growth spurt was finally over. Hailey walked out of the stall topless stood in front of the mirror to gauge how much her breasts grew. Since it was past midnight, she didn’t need to worry about anyone coming in. Her breasts looked noticeably fuller especially at the bottom and gave them an even more pendulous look. Hailey anxiously put on her bra to see how much her breasts would bulge out. They spilled out over the top and to the side. Luckily, over her baggy shirt, the bulges weren’t as obvious.
Hailey checked her phone and saw that it was well past midnight. Her boyfriend, Sandy, had left her a voice message saying he was worried and that she should call him back as soon as possible. Hailey dialed.
“Hello?” Sandy picked up.
“Sandy, I’m so sorry. It’s just…”
“It’s just what? Hailey, are you okay?”
“I don’t know. I don’t know what’s happening and I don’t know what to do.” Hailey choked up.
“Hailey, where are you right now? Are you safe?”
“Yeah, I’m safe. I’m in a bathroom right now.”
“What building? I’ll come get you!”
“I’m in Uder Hall. Second floor bathroom.”
“Wait there, okay? I’ll come get you as soon as I can. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“Alright, I’ll see you in five minutes.” Sandy hung up as he started sprinting towards Uder Hall.
Hailey checked her texts and replied to all her friends who were worried as well. She told them she was fine although that was a complete lie. But she was not ready to tell her friends about what had just happened. In fact, Hailey was not even sure if she felt ready to tell Sandy. Then she realized that he might figure out on his own anyway. Before Hailey could decide whether to tell Sandy, the phone rang.

Category:Events

2015-02-05T16:29:49Z

89.31.57.5: new recurring event

Official, Semi-Official, one-off and other events at the Noisebridge space.

=Event Calendar=
<onlyinclude>
Not all events make it onto this calendar. Many events only make it to the [https://www.noisebridge.net/pipermail/noisebridge-discuss/ Discussion] or [https://www.noisebridge.net/pipermail/noisebridge-announce/ Announcements] mailing lists, [[IRC]] or in person at [[:Category:Meeting_Notes | Tuesday meetings]]. Best of all, Noisebridge is about people getting together at the space in San Francisco to do stuff. DO pay attention, as some events just arise organically from the bottom up!

'''Want to host your event at Noisebridge?''' We like seeing classes and talks on interesting things pertaining to various subjects of hacking. Most of all, we like seeing familiar faces. Please participate in the space and our [[Meetings|weekly Tuesday meetings]] to see if we're the right audience for what you want to share before announcing a new event. Additionally, please see our [[Hosting an Event|events hosting page]] for suggestions on how to use Noisebridge for your event/class/workshop.

=== Upcoming Events <small>[https://www.noisebridge.net/index.php?title=Category:Events&action=edit&section=2 edit]</small> ===




'''Thursday, February 12th, 2015, 7pm to 9pm:''' [[SFAwesomeMixer|San Francisco Awesome Foundation Mixer]]<br>

'''Sunday, February 15th, 2015, 6pm to 10pm:''' [[EniacDay|Eniac Day]] -- Film party to celebrate the turning-on of the first electronic computer. In Hackatorium<br>

'''Wednesday, February 18th, 2015, 7pm to 9pm:''' - Dirty Shop Safety<br>

'''Thursday, February 19th, 2015, 7ish to whenever:''' -- '5 Minutes of Fame', featuring the return of [[User:Malaclyps|Danny O'Brien]].<br>

'''Thursday, February 26th, 2015, 6pm - 10pm''' -- Transgender Women of Color Murder Map - Data search event, help us track down data on murdered TWOC.<br>

'''Saturday, February 28th, 2015, 8pm to ?:''' [[ProjectX]] -- Participatory art/music/hack party. Expect anything. In Hackatorium, Turing and Church.<br>

'''Friday, June 26th, 2015, 7am to 6pm:''' Library event (''details hacked as Summertime approaches'')
<div class="recurring-events">

=== Recurring Events <small>[https://www.noisebridge.net/index.php?title=Category:Events&action=edit&section=3 edit]</small> ===

{{Template:Recurring}} - Every week.<br>
{{Template:RecurringNumbered|1st}} - Certain weeks, e.g. 1st week only.<br>
{{Template:RecurringException|-2nd}} - Except certain weeks, or other schedule exceptions.


==== Mondays ====
* {{Template:Recurring}} '''7:30 pm - 10:00 pm [[Circuit Hacking Mondays]]'''  <span style="color:black">''</span><div style="padding-left: 30px; max-width: 725px;">- Learn to solder! And make cool things with electronics. [[User:maltman23|Mitch]], Rolf, [[User:Miloh|Miloh]], [[User:Cedric|Cedric]], Cheng, Greg, and/or a host of others will bring kits-for-purchase to make cool, hackable things for all skill levels that you can bring home after you make them! Many designed for '''absolute beginners'''! Bring your own projects to hack! Bring things to fix! All ages. All are welcome! See the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss Discuss list] and the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-announce Announce list] for weekly updates.</div>
* {{Template:Recurring}} '''8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[Front-end Web Development]]''' - Learn HTML/CSS/JS. A series of talks on different topics every week. Recap of last week's material starts at 7:30 pm. Join the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/webdev WebDev list] or the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-announce Announce list] for updates.
* {{Template:Recurring}} [[House_Keeping#Trash_and_Recycling|Take Out the Trash Night -- Round One]] Be sure to put bins out by midnight as the trash truck comes between 1:30 to 2:30am.

==== Tuesdays ====

* {{Template:Recurring}} '''7:00 pm - 9:00 pm [http://www.railsschool.org Ruby and Rails class]''' - Seminar and workshop for learning everything about Ruby, Rails, and web application development (Church classroom). See the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-announce Announce list] for weekly updates.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm [[PyClass]] - '''Intermediate Python with PyClass''' - Crash course in the Python standard library
* {{Template:Recurring}} '''7:00 pm [[Meetings|Noisebridge Weekly Meeting]]''' - Introducing new people and events to the space, general discussion, and decision-making on key issues. '''This is your space, folks. Come on out here in person to express what you think about what's going on with it!'''

==== Wednesdays ====

* {{Template:Recurring}} 6:00 pm - 8:00pm SF-LUG Weekly Linux Discussion Group, held in the Turing classroom.
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} {{Template:RecurringException|alternating monthly}} 7:00 pm - 9:30 pm '''Next NB meetup 25th Feb, alternating monthly between SF and South Bay''' - [[Cyberspectrum|Cyberspectrum: Software Defined Radio Meetup]] in Hackatorium '''(new)''': A place to learn and exchange ideas about SDR. Presentations on concepts, mystery signals, hardware/software and cool applications.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[DreamTeam| Dream Team Neuro Hackery]] - EEG research & development project with general interest in sleep, dreaming, creative intelligence, and many loosely related topics such as: neurophysiology, signal processing, cognitive neuroscience, and (especially) hacking code and devices for data acquisition and analysis. Join us at the [[CollaborationStation]] (near the Hackatorium). Expect general discussion around 8 PM - usually moving along by 9 PM to focus on more technical aspects of current project.

==== Thursdays ====
* {{Template:Recurring}} [[House_Keeping#Trash_and_Recycling|Trash Night -- Round Two]] - Take out the trash for Friday morning! Do it by midnight as truck comes 1:30-2:30am.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 7:00 pm [[Digital Archivists]] - Learn how to scan books and help build book scanners.

* {{Template:Recurring}} 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm [[PyClass]] - '''Intermediate Python with PyClass''' - Crash course in the Python standard library
* {{Template:Recurring}} 7:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[Maker_Faire_2015]] - '''Noisebridge Maker Fair 2015''' - Come to Noisebridge Thursdays 19:00 - 22:00 and help make this a thing. We need makers, presenters, and teachers.
* {{Template:Recurring}} {{Template:RecurringException|-3rd}} 7:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[3D Thursday]] Weekly meetup (non-3rd-thursdays) at Noisebridge focusing on 3D Printers, CNC machines, FabLabs, and replicating machines of all kinds.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[Front-end_Web_Development#Lab|Front-end Web Development Lab]] - Understand by doing! A recap of Monday's lecture in workshop form - and a good time for one-on-one help with the material.
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} '''8:00 pm [[Five Minutes of Fame]]''' a.k.a. 5MoF - lightning 5min talks every 3rd Thursday of the month

==== Fridays ====
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|1st}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|5th}} 6:00 pm - 8:00 pm [[Computerology]] in Turing or [[CollaborationStation]], understanding and using computers
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|1st}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|5th}} 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[FUN Tutoring]] @ [[CollaborationStation]]

==== Saturdays ====
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|2nd}} 12:00 pm - 2:00 pm '''[[Godwafflenoisepancakes]]''' An afternoon of noise music and vegan pancakes. Monthly dates vary. Next show is January 10th, 2015 @12:00 with Leah Peah and Fenian. Turn it up... bring the noise!!!

* {{Template:Recurring}} 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm [[Learn C++]] - Learn C++ in Turing.

==== Sundays ====
* {{Template:Recurring}} 12:30 pm - 7:30 pm [[Dungeons and Dragons]] in Church, currently looking for new players.
* {{Template:RecurringException|alternating monthly}} 1:00 pm Monthly Lock Sport Collaboration: Come learn how to pick locks and learn more about them with the [http://www.tooolsf.org/ SF Bay Area chapter] of [http://toool.us/ TOOOL]. The group meets on alternating months at Noisebridge and in San Jose. Check the [https://groups.google.com/forum/#!forum/tooolsf-announce TOOOL SF announcement list] for details.
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|2nd}} 2:00 pm [[BAHA]] - [http://baha.bitrot.info Bay Area Hacker's Association] - security meeting
* {{Template:Recurring}} 3:00 pm [[Go]] - Playing of the Go board game. On nice days we often take the boards to Dolores Park and play there.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 6:00 pm [[Plan 9]] class (if not Noisebridge check Sycamore)
</div>
</onlyinclude>

If you'd like to contact somebody at Noisebridge regarding these Events or even the Noisebridge Wiki itself, then please send an email message to one of the Board members listed in the [[Contacts]] list, e.g., <secretary@noisebridge.net> or <treasurer@noisebridge.net>

=== Orphaned Events ===
These events appear to be dormant or extinct.

* SAT 10:15 - 12:10 [[Juggling with Judy!]] Note: next class is scheduled for Saturday June 29th. Attention juggling fans! Judy will be at the 2013 World Juggling Day celebration Saturday June 15th at Ripley's Believe It Or Not Odditorium in San Francisco Fisherman's Warf - free event begins at 1. Come check it out!
* THU 18:00 - 21:00 '''[[Privacy Bay]]''' - A monthly meetup for Bay Area folks interested in privacy. Meets in Church on the last Thursday of the month.
* FRI 19:00 - 21:00 [[Anarchy_101|Anarchy 101]] - a class/seminar on what anarchy is and is not, and how it impacts us as individuals and as discrete groups.
* SUN 13:00 [[Songbridge]]: (Bi-monthly) Learn how to make and record music with a computerWe cover midi and vst as well as multi-track recordingBring your laptop.
* 20:00 - 22:00 [[Noise~_Wednesday | Noise~ Wed]] - Graphical media programming with Max/MSP/Jitter

*19:00 [[Tahoe-LAFS]] - Occasional meetup of users and/or developers of the Least Authority File System.

* 14:00 - 16:00 Android Developer Support Group - Meet up with other app developers in the library for a lightly structured knowledge-share.

=== Proposed Future Events and Classes ===
:'''(TBD)''': [[Sound Science]] A potential monthly lecture/demonstration series on the little known science behind sound reproductionTopics to include: Transducer Physics(speakers and mics), Room Acoustics, Signal Path and Cabling,Loudspeaker design 101, Music Production Tips for Big Sound, and How to make a small system sound HUGEEach session to include hands on projects like making speakers from stuff lying around, Non-Newtonian bass monsters, and ez speaker mods for anyoneIf interested contact the new guy-> MattLong8 at gmail dot com, 805 four five three - six zero nine seven
:'''(TBD)''': [[Modular Synthesis]] a bi-weekly (or monthly) group devoted to modular synthesizers> workshop will include modular sound synthesis styles and techniques, a study of different modules and their functions, ie voltage controlled oscillator, voltage controlled filter, low frequency oscillator, envelope generator ect and how these modules interact with each other, what control voltage and triggers are..... as well as one on one time for each student with the modular, which is a 60 space large format Moog style modular synthesizer with big knobs and 1/4 jacks including performance and other awesomeness by Douglas. contact Douglas at greenshoos at gmail dotcom
:'''(TBD)''': [[VideoHacking]] a weekly video/video art devoted hacker group, including experiments in the 3D vr realm...if interested contact julialc4@gmail.com
:Wednesdays at 21:00 [[Brewing Bridge]] - Malakkar Proposal: Learn how to make your drinks fun AND antibacterial, using yeastThis will be recurring if enough interest or need is presentAssociated items - what to do with brewing leftovers, and brewers sample hour, etc.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Probability]] - Weekly probability study group based on [http://ocw.mit.edu/courses/electrical-engineering-and-computer-science/6-041-probabilistic-systems-analysis-and-applied-probability-spring-2006/related-resources/ Fundamentals of Applied Probability Theory] by Al Drake
:'''(TBD)''': [[Mandarin Corner|Mandarin]] - Learn or practice Mandarin, all levels. Also currently on hiatus. Get on the mailing list.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Movie Night!]] - [[User:ThOMG|Thom]] wants to build community through nerdy sci-fi! (+Bill+Ted+Excellence++) (how about a Friday hacker movie night? -[[User:Carl|Carl]])
:'''(TBD)''': [[Introduction to the AVR Microcontroller]] - [[User:Mightyohm|Jeff]] and [[User:Maltman23|Mitch]] are planning an introductory class for people wanting to make cool projects with AVRs.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Basic Chemistry Lab Techniques]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Cuddle Puddle for the Economy]] - Stress-hacking with informal massage exchange.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Milk and Cookies]] - Come read your favorite selections out loudWith Milk and Cookies (and yeah, probably beer too).
:'''(TBD)''': [[Processing Workshop 2]] - [[User:Scmurray|Scott]] is interested in teaching this, and is busy thinking about what, where, when, why, and how.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Hack your Hardware]] -- We call BS on "no user-serviceable parts inside"
:'''(TBD)''': [[Homebrew Instruction Class]] - The Wort (pt 1/3)
:'''(TBD)''': [[Trip to Shooting Range]] - Field trip to a shooting range, to shoot guns Express interest at [[Trip to Shooting Range]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Surface Mount Soldering Workshop]] - Learn how to solder cicuits with small surface mount parts [[User:maltman23|Mitch Altman]] and Martin Bogomolni and others will show their tricks [[User:maltman23|Mitch]] will bring hackable kits that uses surface mounts for you to solder<-YES!(mattlong8 at gmail dot com)
:'''(TBD)''' - [[Locksport and Lockpicking]]
:'''(TBD)''' - [[Version control tutorial]]
:'''(TBD)''' - [[Foreign language learning for rocket scientists]] - I'm near-native (fool people when I try) in (French and) Japanese, and a pro trans/terpreter and will share my shortcuts (skill-order, vocab, speed/articulation, translation≅grammar)No expertise on tonal languages yet..so if you know how to remember tones or how tone-sandhi interacts with speed and/or how nuances of speaker attitude are expressed in them (what we do with rythm/inflection/sentence-intonation and stress in Eng., and with particles and ??? in e.gCantonese) please chime in or call me (415-608-0564) so I can convey your wisdom[also looking for a from-scratch Arabic partner]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Getting started with Arduino]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Distributed Databases]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Node.js Beginners Session]] - Interested in learning about Node.js? I amMaybe these guys want to teach it: http://www.meetup.com/Joyent-Cloud-User-Group/events/81311542/

:'''(TBD)''': [[Scrum Club]] - I though I'd test the waters and see if anyone was interested in a noisebridge scrum club details are here http://scrumclub.org/scrum-clubs/ if inturested hit me up twitter: @theabcasian, facebook: http://www.facebook.com/theabcasian
:'''(TBD)''': [[CNC Mill Workshop]] - Who wants to make stuff on the [[MaxNCMill]]?
:'''(TBD)''': [[Math & Science Help]] - If you would like some math, science or engineering help, I'm down to lend a hand.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Cyborg Group|Cyborg Group / Sensebridge]] - Work on projects like artificial senses Someone needs to lead this!
:'''(TBD)''': [[OpenEEG]] - Brain techHas historically met on Sundays, at the behest of interested parties.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Programming_for_Poets | Programming for Poets]] - Gentle intro to programming using Processing
:'''(TBD)''': [[World Builders & Simgineers]] - Work together to create a beautiful & open virtual world & platform.
:'''(TBD)''': [[PlunderBridge]] - Metal detecting, detector technology & treasure hunting expeditions.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Ruby Mining]] - Ruby on Rails basics, interactive working group
:'''(TBD)''': [[MoinMoin Wiki]] - MoinMoin Wiki (details see there)
:'''(TBD)''': [[Noisebridge Fundraiser 2013]]

= Past Events =

===2014===
*{{event
|time = Sunday, September 23, 5:00pm
|title = How to Start a Startup MOOC Lecture Viewings
|description = We would get together to watch the lectures together and conduct discussion and networking afterwards. http://startupclass.samaltman.com/
|}}

===2013===
*{{event
|time = Friday, August 9, 5:00pm
|title = Noisebridge Party Setup
|description = Volunteers will be preparing the space for Saturday's show. There are no scheduled conflicts; you might be asked to move multiple times by someone pushing a broom and assembling a raised stage simultaneously.
|}}

*{{event
|time = Saturday, August 10, 4:00pm
|title = Noisebridge "______ the Bridge" Party
|description = <span style="color:#ff00ff; background:##ff00ff"> a summer fundraising party for Noisebridge, which YOU are invited to!</span>
|suggested donation = $10, but no one turned away for lack of funds
|}}

*{{event
|time = Sunday, August 11, 2:00pm
|title = Bay Area Hackers' Association Meeting
|description = Jon Callas presenting on [[BAHA/2013-08-11|Secure Communications, Privacy, Counter-Surveillance]].
|}}

* '''Wednesday, May 22, 7.00 pm: Instructables Build Night''' - Bare Conductive, Instructables will supply Bare Conductive paint pens and pizza. Come experiment with the paint and post some Instructables. This is a FREE event.

===2012===
* '''December 20, Thursday, 20:00 - 22:00 - [[5MoF|5 Minutes of Fame]]''' - Following up on its triumphant return in November, 5MoF is back with another showcase of lightning talks & other good stuff, with your host Sir Danny O'Brien! Details TBA
*'''Tuesday Feb14th, 18:00 to 20:00''' ZiP MegaZine releases its inaugural issue with '''My Noisy Valentine''' Zine Release Microparty in the Noisebridge cafeFor more info follow [[zine | this]] link.
* '''Wednesday, Jan30, 20:00-22:00''' [[zine|ZiP]] meeting for zine-makers & others with an interest in printing & self-publishingThe meeting 1/30/13 is our first since mid-2012We plan to hold them regularly from now on at this time (Wednesday 8pm)This meeting will be informal & will probably take place in the printing/lasercutter area of the hackerspace.

===2011===

* '''September 11th 14:00 to 17:00''' - The San Francisco Chapter of the Open Organisation Of Lockpickers and Bay Area Hacker's Association present a joint meeting on [https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Locksport locksport]
*'''August 4, 7PM, Thursday''' - [http://zeidman.net Bob Zeidman] will be giving a talk on video games and intellectual property, hosted by TheMADEHe will also speak about IP infringement cases.
*'''August 9, 6:30PM, Tuesday''' - [http://www.meetup.com/makesf/events/26413241/ Make:SF] - Chris Jefferies will speak about the wireless sensor kit he is developing and we are bringing back our all star soldering kits.

* '''April 13th, 19:00''' - Kombucha fermentation class with [[BioBridge]]
*'''April 7th, 20:00''' - [[In-Depth|Noisebridge: In-Depth]] Our monthly lecture and round tableThis month's speaker will be Aragorn! his lecture will be "Anarchism & technology: An unbridgeable chasm"
*'''April 4th, 20:00''' - Camp KDE PartyCome and meet part of the KDE North America community and get a quick overview of this year's [http://camp.kde.org/ Camp KDE] conferenceThere will be beer
*'''April 3rd, 16:00''' - NoiseCaching: Meet-up to build some geocaches, and talk about making geocoinsThen we'll head out to find some local caches and place caches we made[http://www.geocaching.com More info about Geocaching here]
* '''March 20th, 19:00''' [[Hack Politics]] meetup -- the first meetup to figure out how we in the hacker community can effectively mobilize and create meaningful change in these interesting times
* '''March 12th, 12:00-18:00 - Noisebridge Hackathon!''' Second Saturday Hackathon is a casual monthly event dedicated to working on the space or relevant projects and building community This is a great time to get feedback or help on any projects you have been considering that center around the space, culture, and infrastructure of Noisebridge You can also help with existing projects and find out ways to get involved.
* '''March 10, Thursday, 19:00 - Group Grammar Clinic''' - Church Classroom - Donations gladly accepted - A clinic for grammar and writing evaluationPlease bring your web/social or technical writing for us to evaluateBring your laptop as well Collaboration groupware possibly provided(Please suggest groupware software to use if you wish)Constructive feedback from other group members is encouraged so that this clinic is a group process- Facilitator: [[User:Owen|Owen]] (opietro@yahoo.com)
* '''March 9th, 20:00''' - Ferment and filter a mash! [[fermentation logs]]

===2010===
* '''Sunday, August 22, 19:00 CLUB-MATE DROPOFF AND TASTING PARTY''' Nick Farr will be in town to drop off Club-Mate ordered by San Franciscans!
* '''June 5th, 12:00-19:00 - [[NoiseBridgeRehab]]''' - Help make the space more usable and accessible! Noisebridge needs your help!
* '''June 5th, 16:00-20:00 - [[Science For Juggalos]]''' - Science Fair in front of the Warfield Theater teaching magnetism to Juggalos
* '''June 6th, 15:00 - [[AVC Meetup]]''' - Entrepreneurial bonding & matchmaking
* '''June 9th, 21:00 - Your liver supports Noisebridge''' - Come to Elixir @ 16th & Guerrero anytime after 21:00 and drink, drink, drink! 50% of tips go to Noisebridge
* '''February 27th, 20:00 - [[Hacker EPROM]]''' - Noisebridge's first prom! Nice tie and a (robot) date requiredWe will have a DJ and punch.
* '''February 24th, 19:00, Wednesday - Joris Peels, of [http://www.shapeways.com Shapeways]''', and expert on 3D printing, will give a [[ShaperwaysPresentation | talk and demonstration]] at Noisebridge!.
* '''February 23rd, 18:00 - Cleaning day''' - Come and help clean Noisebridge, because everyone loves a clean hack space.
* '''February 12th, 21:00 - visit from Steve Jackson'''Game designer [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steve_Jackson_%28US_game_designer%29 Steve Jackson], founder of Steve Jackson Games, will visit Noisebridge.
* '''January 27th, 18:00-20:00 - [[beatrixjar event|Circuit Bending Workshop]]''' - [http://www.beatrixjar.com/ Beatrix*JAR] (contact [[User:Gpvillamil|Gian Pablo]] for more info)
* '''January 27th, 20:00-22:00 - [[beatrixjar event|Circuit Bending Performance]]''' - [http://www.beatrixjar.com/ Beatrix*JAR] - "Celebrate a night of new sound that will change your idea of music forever!"
* '''January 25th, 19:30 - [[Bag Porn]]''' - What's in your bag?
* '''January 20th, 19:00-21:00 - [http://groups.google.com/group/bacat/about Bay Categories & Types]''' - Categories, monoids, monads, functors and more! Held in the Alonzo Church classroom.
* '''January 20th, 19:00 - [[User Experience Book Club SF]]''' - Our book this month is "A Theory of Fun for Game Design" by Raph Koster - http://is.gd/6sEqw (meets in Turing)
* '''January 21st, 20:00 - [[Five Minutes of Fame]]''' - Monthly set of lightning talks on diverse topics
* '''January 22nd, 17:00 - [[CleaningParty| Cleaning Party]]''' - Come help clean up Noisebridge! Awsum fun!
* ...January 14th,16th, and 17th 1:00- ??? Build Out day for kitchen/bathroom/laundry bring yourself and a good attitude, learn a few things as well
* '''January 15th, 18:00 - [[CNC_Mill_Workshop]]''' - Learn to use the CNC mill for 2D engraving and circuit board routing
* Thursdays 17:00 [[ASL Group|American Sign Language]] - Learn how to talk without using your voice (or just come chat in ASL)<small>[http://whenisgood.net/noisebridge/asl/generic click to reschedule]</small>

===2009===
* '''November 18th, 19:30''' - [[Dorkbot_2009_11_18|Dorkbot]]
* '''November 19th, 18:00''' - [[Mesh meetup]]
* '''November 19th, 20:00''' - [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
* '''November 20th, 18:00''' - Loud Objects [http://www.flickr.com/photos/createdigitalmedia/3428249036/ Noise Toy workshop].
* '''November 20th, 20:00''' - Performance by [http://www.loudobjects.com/ Loud Objects], (featuring Tristan Perich and Lesley Flanigan) and [http://www.myspace.com/jibkidder Jib Kidder].
:'''2009-11-05''' - [http://www.server-sky.com/ Server Sky presentation: Internet and Computation in Orbit] by Keith Lofstrom
:'''2009-11-05''' - [[Mesh meetup]]
:'''2009-11-02''' - [[French]] book club meeting to discuss [http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/2842612892/ref=ord_cart_shr?_encoding=UTF8&m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&v=glance Une Si Longue Lettre]
: ''' October 1st, 18:00''' - [[Wireless_Mesh_Network_Meetup | Mesh wireless meetup]]
: ''' October 1st, 19:00''' - [http://groups.google.com/group/bacat Bay Area Categories and Types]
: '''2009-10-03''' [[Year 1 Open Hacker House]]
:'''Friday''': [[CrazyCryptoNight]] - Discussion of cryptography for beginners through experts6-???
:'''Sunday''' : [[OpenEEG | OpenEEG Hacking]] Sundays, at 3-5pm.
:'''Monday''': [[German]] - Learn German, all levels7pm beginners, 8pm advancedRSVP 24 hours in advance for the benefit of the instructorEvents ran May-November 2009Currently on Thursdays at 8Get on the mailing list.
:'''Tuesday''': [[Haskell/Haschool]] - Learn Haskell with Jason Dusek 6PM - 7:30PM, from May until we're all experts.
:'''Wednesday''': [[Adobe_Lightroom|Adobe Lightroom]] - Become a more organized photographerWeekly class (mostly held off site).
:'''Thursday''': [[Professional VFX Compositing With Adobe After Effects]] - Taught by [[User:SFSlim|Aaron Muszalski]]7:30PM - 10PM, most Thursdays in May & June & ? (click through dammit)
:'''2009-09-17''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] 3D Edition
:'''2009-09-17''': [[Wireless Mesh Network Meetup | Mesh wireless meetup]]
:'''2009-08-20''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] One Dee Edition
:'''2009-07-16''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] Zero Dee
:'''2009-07-02 - 2009-07-05''': [http://toorcamp.org Toorcamp]
:'''2009-07-01''': Noisedroid meeting to discuss location logging on Android platform (and other stuff too, I'm sure)
:'''2009-06-30''': [[Powerbocking Class|Powerbocking class]]
:'''2009-06-30''': "Suing Telemarketers for Fun and Profit" (Toorcamp talk preview)
:'''2009-06-28''': "Meditation for Hackers" (Toorcamp workshop preview)
:'''2009-06-18''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
:'''2009-06-15''': [[Eagle Workshop]] Session two of the Eagle CAD workshop.
:'''2009-06-13''': [[RoboGames 2009]] Noisebridge had a booth staffed by vounteers, great fun!
:'''2009-05-21''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
:'''2009-04-27''': [[EagleCAD workshop]] -- learn to use this CAD tool for printed circuit board design
:'''2009-04-16''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] April showers & flowers edition
:'''2009-04-11''': [[RFID Hacking]] weekend workshop (this event moved from the original March date)
:'''2009-04-05''': [[First aid and CPR class]] Learning how to not only not die, but also reduce scarring!
:'''2009-04-03''': [[Sudo pop]] 2PM and onMaking the first batch of a Noisebridge label yerba mate-niated rootbrew, gratis and DIY
:'''2009-03-26''': [[OpenEEG | OpenEEG Hacking]] first meet up for this new group: 8 pm
:'''2009-03-19''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
:'''2009-03-12''': [[OpenBTS and GSM]] talk by David Burgess
:'''2009-02-14''': [[Open Heart Workshop]] Valentine's Day blinkyheart soldering party!
:'''2009-02-13''': [[Time-t_Party|<tt>time_t</tt> Party]] to celebrate 1,234,567,890 since the Unix epoch.
:'''2009-02-09''': [[Spanish learning at 8:30]]
:'''2009-02-05''': [[PGP Key Workshop]]
:'''2009-01-31''': [[Locksport and Lockpicking]]

===2008===
:'''2008-12-27''': [[25C3]] Chaos Computer Congress in Berlin
:'''2008-12-20 & 21''': [[Creme Brulee]] Workshop on creating a french dessert, with bonus propane torch.
:'''2008-12-17 20:00''': [[Machine Learning]] Birds-of-a-feather
:'''2008-11-24''': [[Circuit Hacking Monday]] circuit design workshop
:'''2008-11-21, 7pm''':[[Milk and Cookies]] -- [[User:Dmolnar|David Molnar]] hosts Milk and Cookies at 83CBring a short 5-7minute thing to read to othersBring a potluck cookie/snack/drink if you likeDavid will bring milk and cookies.
:'''2008-11-17, 7:30pm''': [[Basic Bicycle Maintain]] - [[User:rubin110|Rubin]] and [[User:rigel|rigel]] hate it when we see a bike that isn't maintainedScreechy chains and clacking derailleur can go to hellBasic bike tune up, sharing the smarts on simple things you can do at home to make your ride suck a whole lot less.
:'''2008-11-16, 5:00pm''': [[RepRap Soldering Party]] - help assemble RepRap! RSVPs required on wiki! [[User:Adi|adi]]
:'''2008-11-16, 3:00pm''': [[Oscilloscopes]] - Learn how to use this versatile tool to test electronic circuits Maximum 6 slots, please sign up ahead of time! [[User:dstaff|dstaff]]
:'''2008-10-31''': [[Halloween Open House]] - NoiseBridge's own [[PPPC]] threw an awesome open house/halloween galaPost pictures if you got 'em!
:'''2008-10-25''': [[Soldering Workshop]] and Pumpkin Hackin' - Learn to solder for total newbies (or learn to solder better!), including surface mountAdditionally, carve your halloween pumpkins and enjoy some experimental pumpkin pie and/or soup.
:'''2008-10-07''': (tuesday before meeting) - Etch a circuit boardI'll be trying a photo resist etching and a basic printed mask etchingThis is step 1/3 for a project called "annoying USB thingie" which will execute pre-defined keystrokes by sneaking a tiny USB dongle onto a victim^h^h^h^h^h buddy's computer.
:'''2008-09-13''': [[Processing Workshop]] — Learn this very easy-to-use programming language! - [[Processing Workshop Report]]
:'''2008-02-16''': [[Brain Machine Workshop|Brain Machine Making Workshop]]: Our first hardware sprint!

[[Category:Top level]]

Category:Events

2015-02-05T16:24:51Z

89.31.57.5: ordered and tidied up for better readability

Official, Semi-Official, one-off and other events at the Noisebridge space.

=Event Calendar=
<onlyinclude>
Not all events make it onto this calendar. Many events only make it to the [https://www.noisebridge.net/pipermail/noisebridge-discuss/ Discussion] or [https://www.noisebridge.net/pipermail/noisebridge-announce/ Announcements] mailing lists, [[IRC]] or in person at [[:Category:Meeting_Notes | Tuesday meetings]]. Best of all, Noisebridge is about people getting together at the space in San Francisco to do stuff. DO pay attention, as some events just arise organically from the bottom up!

'''Want to host your event at Noisebridge?''' We like seeing classes and talks on interesting things pertaining to various subjects of hacking. Most of all, we like seeing familiar faces. Please participate in the space and our [[Meetings|weekly Tuesday meetings]] to see if we're the right audience for what you want to share before announcing a new event. Additionally, please see our [[Hosting an Event|events hosting page]] for suggestions on how to use Noisebridge for your event/class/workshop.

=== Upcoming Events <small>[https://www.noisebridge.net/index.php?title=Category:Events&action=edit&section=2 edit]</small> ===




'''Thursday, February 12th, 2015, 7pm to 9pm:''' [[SFAwesomeMixer|San Francisco Awesome Foundation Mixer]]<br>

'''Sunday, February 15th, 2015, 6pm to 10pm:''' [[EniacDay|Eniac Day]] -- Film party to celebrate the turning-on of the first electronic computer. In Hackatorium<br>

'''Wednesday, February 18th, 2015, 7pm to 9pm:''' - Dirty Shop Safety<br>

'''Thursday, February 19th, 2015, 7ish to whenever:''' -- '5 Minutes of Fame', featuring the return of [[User:Malaclyps|Danny O'Brien]].<br>

'''Thursday, February 26th, 2015, 6pm - 10pm''' -- Transgender Women of Color Murder Map - Data search event, help us track down data on murdered TWOC.<br>

'''Saturday, February 28th, 2015, 8pm to ?:''' [[ProjectX]] -- Participatory art/music/hack party. Expect anything. In Hackatorium, Turing and Church.<br>

'''Friday, June 26th, 2015, 7am to 6pm:''' Library event (''details hacked as Summertime approaches'')
<div class="recurring-events">

=== Recurring Events <small>[https://www.noisebridge.net/index.php?title=Category:Events&action=edit&section=3 edit]</small> ===

{{Template:Recurring}} - Every week.<br>
{{Template:RecurringNumbered|1st}} - Certain weeks, e.g. 1st week only.<br>
{{Template:RecurringException|-2nd}} - Except certain weeks, or other schedule exceptions.


==== Mondays ====
* {{Template:Recurring}} '''7:30 pm - 10:00 pm [[Circuit Hacking Mondays]]'''  <span style="color:black">''</span><div style="padding-left: 30px; max-width: 725px;">- Learn to solder! And make cool things with electronics. [[User:maltman23|Mitch]], Rolf, [[User:Miloh|Miloh]], [[User:Cedric|Cedric]], Cheng, Greg, and/or a host of others will bring kits-for-purchase to make cool, hackable things for all skill levels that you can bring home after you make them! Many designed for '''absolute beginners'''! Bring your own projects to hack! Bring things to fix! All ages. All are welcome! See the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss Discuss list] and the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-announce Announce list] for weekly updates.</div>
* {{Template:Recurring}} '''8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[Front-end Web Development]]''' - Learn HTML/CSS/JS. A series of talks on different topics every week. Recap of last week's material starts at 7:30 pm. Join the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/webdev WebDev list] or the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-announce Announce list] for updates.
* {{Template:Recurring}} [[House_Keeping#Trash_and_Recycling|Take Out the Trash Night -- Round One]] Be sure to put bins out by midnight as the trash truck comes between 1:30 to 2:30am.

==== Tuesdays ====

* {{Template:Recurring}} '''7:00 pm - 9:00 pm [http://www.railsschool.org Ruby and Rails class]''' - Seminar and workshop for learning everything about Ruby, Rails, and web application development (Church classroom). See the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-announce Announce list] for weekly updates.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm [[PyClass]] - '''Intermediate Python with PyClass''' - Crash course in the Python standard library
* {{Template:Recurring}} '''7:00 pm [[Meetings|Noisebridge Weekly Meeting]]''' - Introducing new people and events to the space, general discussion, and decision-making on key issues. '''This is your space, folks. Come on out here in person to express what you think about what's going on with it!'''

==== Wednesdays ====

* {{Template:Recurring}} 6:00 pm - 8:00pm SF-LUG Weekly Linux Discussion Group, held in the Turing classroom.
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} {{Template:RecurringException|alternating monthly}} 7:00 pm - 9:30 pm '''Next NB meetup 25th Feb, alternating monthly between SF and South Bay''' - [[Cyberspectrum|Cyberspectrum: Software Defined Radio Meetup]] in Hackatorium '''(new)''': A place to learn and exchange ideas about SDR. Presentations on concepts, mystery signals, hardware/software and cool applications.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[DreamTeam| Dream Team Neuro Hackery]] - EEG research & development project with general interest in sleep, dreaming, creative intelligence, and many loosely related topics such as: neurophysiology, signal processing, cognitive neuroscience, and (especially) hacking code and devices for data acquisition and analysis. Join us at the [[CollaborationStation]] (near the Hackatorium). Expect general discussion around 8 PM - usually moving along by 9 PM to focus on more technical aspects of current project.

==== Thursdays ====
* {{Template:Recurring}} [[House_Keeping#Trash_and_Recycling|Trash Night -- Round Two]] - Take out the trash for Friday morning! Do it by midnight as truck comes 1:30-2:30am.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 7:00 pm [[Digital Archivists]] - Learn how to scan books and help build book scanners.

* {{Template:Recurring}} 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm [[PyClass]] - '''Intermediate Python with PyClass''' - Crash course in the Python standard library
* {{Template:Recurring}} {{Template:RecurringException|-3rd}} 7:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[3D Thursday]] Weekly meetup (non-3rd-thursdays) at Noisebridge focusing on 3D Printers, CNC machines, FabLabs, and replicating machines of all kinds.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[Front-end_Web_Development#Lab|Front-end Web Development Lab]] - Understand by doing! A recap of Monday's lecture in workshop form - and a good time for one-on-one help with the material.
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} '''8:00 pm [[Five Minutes of Fame]]''' a.k.a. 5MoF - lightning 5min talks every 3rd Thursday of the month

==== Fridays ====
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|1st}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|5th}} 6:00 pm - 8:00 pm [[Computerology]] in Turing or [[CollaborationStation]], understanding and using computers
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|1st}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|5th}} 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[FUN Tutoring]] @ [[CollaborationStation]]

==== Saturdays ====
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|2nd}} 12:00 pm - 2:00 pm '''[[Godwafflenoisepancakes]]''' An afternoon of noise music and vegan pancakes. Monthly dates vary. Next show is January 10th, 2015 @12:00 with Leah Peah and Fenian. Turn it up... bring the noise!!!

* {{Template:Recurring}} 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm [[Learn C++]] - Learn C++ in Turing.

==== Sundays ====
* {{Template:Recurring}} 12:30 pm - 7:30 pm [[Dungeons and Dragons]] in Church, currently looking for new players.
* {{Template:RecurringException|alternating monthly}} 1:00 pm Monthly Lock Sport Collaboration: Come learn how to pick locks and learn more about them with the [http://www.tooolsf.org/ SF Bay Area chapter] of [http://toool.us/ TOOOL]. The group meets on alternating months at Noisebridge and in San Jose. Check the [https://groups.google.com/forum/#!forum/tooolsf-announce TOOOL SF announcement list] for details.
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|2nd}} 2:00 pm [[BAHA]] - [http://baha.bitrot.info Bay Area Hacker's Association] - security meeting
* {{Template:Recurring}} 3:00 pm [[Go]] - Playing of the Go board game. On nice days we often take the boards to Dolores Park and play there.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 6:00 pm [[Plan 9]] class (if not Noisebridge check Sycamore)
</div>
</onlyinclude>

If you'd like to contact somebody at Noisebridge regarding these Events or even the Noisebridge Wiki itself, then please send an email message to one of the Board members listed in the [[Contacts]] list, e.g., <secretary@noisebridge.net> or <treasurer@noisebridge.net>

=== Orphaned Events ===
These events appear to be dormant or extinct.

* SAT 10:15 - 12:10 [[Juggling with Judy!]] Note: next class is scheduled for Saturday June 29th. Attention juggling fans! Judy will be at the 2013 World Juggling Day celebration Saturday June 15th at Ripley's Believe It Or Not Odditorium in San Francisco Fisherman's Warf - free event begins at 1. Come check it out!
* THU 18:00 - 21:00 '''[[Privacy Bay]]''' - A monthly meetup for Bay Area folks interested in privacy. Meets in Church on the last Thursday of the month.
* FRI 19:00 - 21:00 [[Anarchy_101|Anarchy 101]] - a class/seminar on what anarchy is and is not, and how it impacts us as individuals and as discrete groups.
* SUN 13:00 [[Songbridge]]: (Bi-monthly) Learn how to make and record music with a computerWe cover midi and vst as well as multi-track recordingBring your laptop.
* 20:00 - 22:00 [[Noise~_Wednesday | Noise~ Wed]] - Graphical media programming with Max/MSP/Jitter

*19:00 [[Tahoe-LAFS]] - Occasional meetup of users and/or developers of the Least Authority File System.

* 14:00 - 16:00 Android Developer Support Group - Meet up with other app developers in the library for a lightly structured knowledge-share.

=== Proposed Future Events and Classes ===
:'''(TBD)''': [[Sound Science]] A potential monthly lecture/demonstration series on the little known science behind sound reproductionTopics to include: Transducer Physics(speakers and mics), Room Acoustics, Signal Path and Cabling,Loudspeaker design 101, Music Production Tips for Big Sound, and How to make a small system sound HUGEEach session to include hands on projects like making speakers from stuff lying around, Non-Newtonian bass monsters, and ez speaker mods for anyoneIf interested contact the new guy-> MattLong8 at gmail dot com, 805 four five three - six zero nine seven
:'''(TBD)''': [[Modular Synthesis]] a bi-weekly (or monthly) group devoted to modular synthesizers> workshop will include modular sound synthesis styles and techniques, a study of different modules and their functions, ie voltage controlled oscillator, voltage controlled filter, low frequency oscillator, envelope generator ect and how these modules interact with each other, what control voltage and triggers are..... as well as one on one time for each student with the modular, which is a 60 space large format Moog style modular synthesizer with big knobs and 1/4 jacks including performance and other awesomeness by Douglas. contact Douglas at greenshoos at gmail dotcom
:'''(TBD)''': [[VideoHacking]] a weekly video/video art devoted hacker group, including experiments in the 3D vr realm...if interested contact julialc4@gmail.com
:Wednesdays at 21:00 [[Brewing Bridge]] - Malakkar Proposal: Learn how to make your drinks fun AND antibacterial, using yeastThis will be recurring if enough interest or need is presentAssociated items - what to do with brewing leftovers, and brewers sample hour, etc.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Probability]] - Weekly probability study group based on [http://ocw.mit.edu/courses/electrical-engineering-and-computer-science/6-041-probabilistic-systems-analysis-and-applied-probability-spring-2006/related-resources/ Fundamentals of Applied Probability Theory] by Al Drake
:'''(TBD)''': [[Mandarin Corner|Mandarin]] - Learn or practice Mandarin, all levels. Also currently on hiatus. Get on the mailing list.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Movie Night!]] - [[User:ThOMG|Thom]] wants to build community through nerdy sci-fi! (+Bill+Ted+Excellence++) (how about a Friday hacker movie night? -[[User:Carl|Carl]])
:'''(TBD)''': [[Introduction to the AVR Microcontroller]] - [[User:Mightyohm|Jeff]] and [[User:Maltman23|Mitch]] are planning an introductory class for people wanting to make cool projects with AVRs.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Basic Chemistry Lab Techniques]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Cuddle Puddle for the Economy]] - Stress-hacking with informal massage exchange.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Milk and Cookies]] - Come read your favorite selections out loudWith Milk and Cookies (and yeah, probably beer too).
:'''(TBD)''': [[Processing Workshop 2]] - [[User:Scmurray|Scott]] is interested in teaching this, and is busy thinking about what, where, when, why, and how.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Hack your Hardware]] -- We call BS on "no user-serviceable parts inside"
:'''(TBD)''': [[Homebrew Instruction Class]] - The Wort (pt 1/3)
:'''(TBD)''': [[Trip to Shooting Range]] - Field trip to a shooting range, to shoot guns Express interest at [[Trip to Shooting Range]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Surface Mount Soldering Workshop]] - Learn how to solder cicuits with small surface mount parts [[User:maltman23|Mitch Altman]] and Martin Bogomolni and others will show their tricks [[User:maltman23|Mitch]] will bring hackable kits that uses surface mounts for you to solder<-YES!(mattlong8 at gmail dot com)
:'''(TBD)''' - [[Locksport and Lockpicking]]
:'''(TBD)''' - [[Version control tutorial]]
:'''(TBD)''' - [[Foreign language learning for rocket scientists]] - I'm near-native (fool people when I try) in (French and) Japanese, and a pro trans/terpreter and will share my shortcuts (skill-order, vocab, speed/articulation, translation≅grammar)No expertise on tonal languages yet..so if you know how to remember tones or how tone-sandhi interacts with speed and/or how nuances of speaker attitude are expressed in them (what we do with rythm/inflection/sentence-intonation and stress in Eng., and with particles and ??? in e.gCantonese) please chime in or call me (415-608-0564) so I can convey your wisdom[also looking for a from-scratch Arabic partner]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Getting started with Arduino]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Distributed Databases]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Node.js Beginners Session]] - Interested in learning about Node.js? I amMaybe these guys want to teach it: http://www.meetup.com/Joyent-Cloud-User-Group/events/81311542/

:'''(TBD)''': [[Scrum Club]] - I though I'd test the waters and see if anyone was interested in a noisebridge scrum club details are here http://scrumclub.org/scrum-clubs/ if inturested hit me up twitter: @theabcasian, facebook: http://www.facebook.com/theabcasian
:'''(TBD)''': [[CNC Mill Workshop]] - Who wants to make stuff on the [[MaxNCMill]]?
:'''(TBD)''': [[Math & Science Help]] - If you would like some math, science or engineering help, I'm down to lend a hand.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Cyborg Group|Cyborg Group / Sensebridge]] - Work on projects like artificial senses Someone needs to lead this!
:'''(TBD)''': [[OpenEEG]] - Brain techHas historically met on Sundays, at the behest of interested parties.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Programming_for_Poets | Programming for Poets]] - Gentle intro to programming using Processing
:'''(TBD)''': [[World Builders & Simgineers]] - Work together to create a beautiful & open virtual world & platform.
:'''(TBD)''': [[PlunderBridge]] - Metal detecting, detector technology & treasure hunting expeditions.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Ruby Mining]] - Ruby on Rails basics, interactive working group
:'''(TBD)''': [[MoinMoin Wiki]] - MoinMoin Wiki (details see there)
:'''(TBD)''': [[Noisebridge Fundraiser 2013]]

= Past Events =

===2014===
*{{event
|time = Sunday, September 23, 5:00pm
|title = How to Start a Startup MOOC Lecture Viewings
|description = We would get together to watch the lectures together and conduct discussion and networking afterwards. http://startupclass.samaltman.com/
|}}

===2013===
*{{event
|time = Friday, August 9, 5:00pm
|title = Noisebridge Party Setup
|description = Volunteers will be preparing the space for Saturday's show. There are no scheduled conflicts; you might be asked to move multiple times by someone pushing a broom and assembling a raised stage simultaneously.
|}}

*{{event
|time = Saturday, August 10, 4:00pm
|title = Noisebridge "______ the Bridge" Party
|description = <span style="color:#ff00ff; background:##ff00ff"> a summer fundraising party for Noisebridge, which YOU are invited to!</span>
|suggested donation = $10, but no one turned away for lack of funds
|}}

*{{event
|time = Sunday, August 11, 2:00pm
|title = Bay Area Hackers' Association Meeting
|description = Jon Callas presenting on [[BAHA/2013-08-11|Secure Communications, Privacy, Counter-Surveillance]].
|}}

* '''Wednesday, May 22, 7.00 pm: Instructables Build Night''' - Bare Conductive, Instructables will supply Bare Conductive paint pens and pizza. Come experiment with the paint and post some Instructables. This is a FREE event.

===2012===
* '''December 20, Thursday, 20:00 - 22:00 - [[5MoF|5 Minutes of Fame]]''' - Following up on its triumphant return in November, 5MoF is back with another showcase of lightning talks & other good stuff, with your host Sir Danny O'Brien! Details TBA
*'''Tuesday Feb14th, 18:00 to 20:00''' ZiP MegaZine releases its inaugural issue with '''My Noisy Valentine''' Zine Release Microparty in the Noisebridge cafeFor more info follow [[zine | this]] link.
* '''Wednesday, Jan30, 20:00-22:00''' [[zine|ZiP]] meeting for zine-makers & others with an interest in printing & self-publishingThe meeting 1/30/13 is our first since mid-2012We plan to hold them regularly from now on at this time (Wednesday 8pm)This meeting will be informal & will probably take place in the printing/lasercutter area of the hackerspace.

===2011===

* '''September 11th 14:00 to 17:00''' - The San Francisco Chapter of the Open Organisation Of Lockpickers and Bay Area Hacker's Association present a joint meeting on [https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Locksport locksport]
*'''August 4, 7PM, Thursday''' - [http://zeidman.net Bob Zeidman] will be giving a talk on video games and intellectual property, hosted by TheMADEHe will also speak about IP infringement cases.
*'''August 9, 6:30PM, Tuesday''' - [http://www.meetup.com/makesf/events/26413241/ Make:SF] - Chris Jefferies will speak about the wireless sensor kit he is developing and we are bringing back our all star soldering kits.

* '''April 13th, 19:00''' - Kombucha fermentation class with [[BioBridge]]
*'''April 7th, 20:00''' - [[In-Depth|Noisebridge: In-Depth]] Our monthly lecture and round tableThis month's speaker will be Aragorn! his lecture will be "Anarchism & technology: An unbridgeable chasm"
*'''April 4th, 20:00''' - Camp KDE PartyCome and meet part of the KDE North America community and get a quick overview of this year's [http://camp.kde.org/ Camp KDE] conferenceThere will be beer
*'''April 3rd, 16:00''' - NoiseCaching: Meet-up to build some geocaches, and talk about making geocoinsThen we'll head out to find some local caches and place caches we made[http://www.geocaching.com More info about Geocaching here]
* '''March 20th, 19:00''' [[Hack Politics]] meetup -- the first meetup to figure out how we in the hacker community can effectively mobilize and create meaningful change in these interesting times
* '''March 12th, 12:00-18:00 - Noisebridge Hackathon!''' Second Saturday Hackathon is a casual monthly event dedicated to working on the space or relevant projects and building community This is a great time to get feedback or help on any projects you have been considering that center around the space, culture, and infrastructure of Noisebridge You can also help with existing projects and find out ways to get involved.
* '''March 10, Thursday, 19:00 - Group Grammar Clinic''' - Church Classroom - Donations gladly accepted - A clinic for grammar and writing evaluationPlease bring your web/social or technical writing for us to evaluateBring your laptop as well Collaboration groupware possibly provided(Please suggest groupware software to use if you wish)Constructive feedback from other group members is encouraged so that this clinic is a group process- Facilitator: [[User:Owen|Owen]] (opietro@yahoo.com)
* '''March 9th, 20:00''' - Ferment and filter a mash! [[fermentation logs]]

===2010===
* '''Sunday, August 22, 19:00 CLUB-MATE DROPOFF AND TASTING PARTY''' Nick Farr will be in town to drop off Club-Mate ordered by San Franciscans!
* '''June 5th, 12:00-19:00 - [[NoiseBridgeRehab]]''' - Help make the space more usable and accessible! Noisebridge needs your help!
* '''June 5th, 16:00-20:00 - [[Science For Juggalos]]''' - Science Fair in front of the Warfield Theater teaching magnetism to Juggalos
* '''June 6th, 15:00 - [[AVC Meetup]]''' - Entrepreneurial bonding & matchmaking
* '''June 9th, 21:00 - Your liver supports Noisebridge''' - Come to Elixir @ 16th & Guerrero anytime after 21:00 and drink, drink, drink! 50% of tips go to Noisebridge
* '''February 27th, 20:00 - [[Hacker EPROM]]''' - Noisebridge's first prom! Nice tie and a (robot) date requiredWe will have a DJ and punch.
* '''February 24th, 19:00, Wednesday - Joris Peels, of [http://www.shapeways.com Shapeways]''', and expert on 3D printing, will give a [[ShaperwaysPresentation | talk and demonstration]] at Noisebridge!.
* '''February 23rd, 18:00 - Cleaning day''' - Come and help clean Noisebridge, because everyone loves a clean hack space.
* '''February 12th, 21:00 - visit from Steve Jackson'''Game designer [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steve_Jackson_%28US_game_designer%29 Steve Jackson], founder of Steve Jackson Games, will visit Noisebridge.
* '''January 27th, 18:00-20:00 - [[beatrixjar event|Circuit Bending Workshop]]''' - [http://www.beatrixjar.com/ Beatrix*JAR] (contact [[User:Gpvillamil|Gian Pablo]] for more info)
* '''January 27th, 20:00-22:00 - [[beatrixjar event|Circuit Bending Performance]]''' - [http://www.beatrixjar.com/ Beatrix*JAR] - "Celebrate a night of new sound that will change your idea of music forever!"
* '''January 25th, 19:30 - [[Bag Porn]]''' - What's in your bag?
* '''January 20th, 19:00-21:00 - [http://groups.google.com/group/bacat/about Bay Categories & Types]''' - Categories, monoids, monads, functors and more! Held in the Alonzo Church classroom.
* '''January 20th, 19:00 - [[User Experience Book Club SF]]''' - Our book this month is "A Theory of Fun for Game Design" by Raph Koster - http://is.gd/6sEqw (meets in Turing)
* '''January 21st, 20:00 - [[Five Minutes of Fame]]''' - Monthly set of lightning talks on diverse topics
* '''January 22nd, 17:00 - [[CleaningParty| Cleaning Party]]''' - Come help clean up Noisebridge! Awsum fun!
* ...January 14th,16th, and 17th 1:00- ??? Build Out day for kitchen/bathroom/laundry bring yourself and a good attitude, learn a few things as well
* '''January 15th, 18:00 - [[CNC_Mill_Workshop]]''' - Learn to use the CNC mill for 2D engraving and circuit board routing
* Thursdays 17:00 [[ASL Group|American Sign Language]] - Learn how to talk without using your voice (or just come chat in ASL)<small>[http://whenisgood.net/noisebridge/asl/generic click to reschedule]</small>

===2009===
* '''November 18th, 19:30''' - [[Dorkbot_2009_11_18|Dorkbot]]
* '''November 19th, 18:00''' - [[Mesh meetup]]
* '''November 19th, 20:00''' - [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
* '''November 20th, 18:00''' - Loud Objects [http://www.flickr.com/photos/createdigitalmedia/3428249036/ Noise Toy workshop].
* '''November 20th, 20:00''' - Performance by [http://www.loudobjects.com/ Loud Objects], (featuring Tristan Perich and Lesley Flanigan) and [http://www.myspace.com/jibkidder Jib Kidder].
:'''2009-11-05''' - [http://www.server-sky.com/ Server Sky presentation: Internet and Computation in Orbit] by Keith Lofstrom
:'''2009-11-05''' - [[Mesh meetup]]
:'''2009-11-02''' - [[French]] book club meeting to discuss [http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/2842612892/ref=ord_cart_shr?_encoding=UTF8&m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&v=glance Une Si Longue Lettre]
: ''' October 1st, 18:00''' - [[Wireless_Mesh_Network_Meetup | Mesh wireless meetup]]
: ''' October 1st, 19:00''' - [http://groups.google.com/group/bacat Bay Area Categories and Types]
: '''2009-10-03''' [[Year 1 Open Hacker House]]
:'''Friday''': [[CrazyCryptoNight]] - Discussion of cryptography for beginners through experts6-???
:'''Sunday''' : [[OpenEEG | OpenEEG Hacking]] Sundays, at 3-5pm.
:'''Monday''': [[German]] - Learn German, all levels7pm beginners, 8pm advancedRSVP 24 hours in advance for the benefit of the instructorEvents ran May-November 2009Currently on Thursdays at 8Get on the mailing list.
:'''Tuesday''': [[Haskell/Haschool]] - Learn Haskell with Jason Dusek 6PM - 7:30PM, from May until we're all experts.
:'''Wednesday''': [[Adobe_Lightroom|Adobe Lightroom]] - Become a more organized photographerWeekly class (mostly held off site).
:'''Thursday''': [[Professional VFX Compositing With Adobe After Effects]] - Taught by [[User:SFSlim|Aaron Muszalski]]7:30PM - 10PM, most Thursdays in May & June & ? (click through dammit)
:'''2009-09-17''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] 3D Edition
:'''2009-09-17''': [[Wireless Mesh Network Meetup | Mesh wireless meetup]]
:'''2009-08-20''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] One Dee Edition
:'''2009-07-16''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] Zero Dee
:'''2009-07-02 - 2009-07-05''': [http://toorcamp.org Toorcamp]
:'''2009-07-01''': Noisedroid meeting to discuss location logging on Android platform (and other stuff too, I'm sure)
:'''2009-06-30''': [[Powerbocking Class|Powerbocking class]]
:'''2009-06-30''': "Suing Telemarketers for Fun and Profit" (Toorcamp talk preview)
:'''2009-06-28''': "Meditation for Hackers" (Toorcamp workshop preview)
:'''2009-06-18''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
:'''2009-06-15''': [[Eagle Workshop]] Session two of the Eagle CAD workshop.
:'''2009-06-13''': [[RoboGames 2009]] Noisebridge had a booth staffed by vounteers, great fun!
:'''2009-05-21''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
:'''2009-04-27''': [[EagleCAD workshop]] -- learn to use this CAD tool for printed circuit board design
:'''2009-04-16''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] April showers & flowers edition
:'''2009-04-11''': [[RFID Hacking]] weekend workshop (this event moved from the original March date)
:'''2009-04-05''': [[First aid and CPR class]] Learning how to not only not die, but also reduce scarring!
:'''2009-04-03''': [[Sudo pop]] 2PM and onMaking the first batch of a Noisebridge label yerba mate-niated rootbrew, gratis and DIY
:'''2009-03-26''': [[OpenEEG | OpenEEG Hacking]] first meet up for this new group: 8 pm
:'''2009-03-19''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
:'''2009-03-12''': [[OpenBTS and GSM]] talk by David Burgess
:'''2009-02-14''': [[Open Heart Workshop]] Valentine's Day blinkyheart soldering party!
:'''2009-02-13''': [[Time-t_Party|<tt>time_t</tt> Party]] to celebrate 1,234,567,890 since the Unix epoch.
:'''2009-02-09''': [[Spanish learning at 8:30]]
:'''2009-02-05''': [[PGP Key Workshop]]
:'''2009-01-31''': [[Locksport and Lockpicking]]

===2008===
:'''2008-12-27''': [[25C3]] Chaos Computer Congress in Berlin
:'''2008-12-20 & 21''': [[Creme Brulee]] Workshop on creating a french dessert, with bonus propane torch.
:'''2008-12-17 20:00''': [[Machine Learning]] Birds-of-a-feather
:'''2008-11-24''': [[Circuit Hacking Monday]] circuit design workshop
:'''2008-11-21, 7pm''':[[Milk and Cookies]] -- [[User:Dmolnar|David Molnar]] hosts Milk and Cookies at 83CBring a short 5-7minute thing to read to othersBring a potluck cookie/snack/drink if you likeDavid will bring milk and cookies.
:'''2008-11-17, 7:30pm''': [[Basic Bicycle Maintain]] - [[User:rubin110|Rubin]] and [[User:rigel|rigel]] hate it when we see a bike that isn't maintainedScreechy chains and clacking derailleur can go to hellBasic bike tune up, sharing the smarts on simple things you can do at home to make your ride suck a whole lot less.
:'''2008-11-16, 5:00pm''': [[RepRap Soldering Party]] - help assemble RepRap! RSVPs required on wiki! [[User:Adi|adi]]
:'''2008-11-16, 3:00pm''': [[Oscilloscopes]] - Learn how to use this versatile tool to test electronic circuits Maximum 6 slots, please sign up ahead of time! [[User:dstaff|dstaff]]
:'''2008-10-31''': [[Halloween Open House]] - NoiseBridge's own [[PPPC]] threw an awesome open house/halloween galaPost pictures if you got 'em!
:'''2008-10-25''': [[Soldering Workshop]] and Pumpkin Hackin' - Learn to solder for total newbies (or learn to solder better!), including surface mountAdditionally, carve your halloween pumpkins and enjoy some experimental pumpkin pie and/or soup.
:'''2008-10-07''': (tuesday before meeting) - Etch a circuit boardI'll be trying a photo resist etching and a basic printed mask etchingThis is step 1/3 for a project called "annoying USB thingie" which will execute pre-defined keystrokes by sneaking a tiny USB dongle onto a victim^h^h^h^h^h buddy's computer.
:'''2008-09-13''': [[Processing Workshop]] — Learn this very easy-to-use programming language! - [[Processing Workshop Report]]
:'''2008-02-16''': [[Brain Machine Workshop|Brain Machine Making Workshop]]: Our first hardware sprint!

[[Category:Top level]]

Category:Events

2015-02-04T09:59:19Z

89.31.57.5: Hack n Tell events still a happenin'?

Official, Semi-Official, one-off and other events at the Noisebridge space.

=Event Calendar=
<onlyinclude>
Not all events make it onto this calendar. Many events only make it to the [https://www.noisebridge.net/pipermail/noisebridge-discuss/ Discussion] or [https://www.noisebridge.net/pipermail/noisebridge-announce/ Announcements] mailing lists, [[IRC]] or in person at [[:Category:Meeting_Notes | Tuesday meetings]]. Best of all, Noisebridge is about people getting together at the space in San Francisco to do stuff. DO pay attention, as some events just arise organically from the bottom up!

'''Want to host your event at Noisebridge?''' We like seeing classes and talks on interesting things pertaining to various subjects of hacking. Most of all, we like seeing familiar faces. Please participate in the space and our [[Meetings|weekly Tuesday meetings]] to see if we're the right audience for what you want to share before announcing a new event. Additionally, please see our [[Hosting an Event|events hosting page]] for suggestions on how to use Noisebridge for your event/class/workshop.

=== Upcoming Events <small>[https://www.noisebridge.net/index.php?title=Category:Events&action=edit&section=2 edit]</small> ===




'''Thursday, February 12th, 2015, 7pm to 9pm:''' [[SFAwesomeMixer|San Francisco Awesome Foundation Mixer]]<br>
'''Sunday, February 15th, 2015, 6pm to 10pm:''' [[EniacDay|Eniac Day]] -- Film party to celebrate the turning-on of the first electronic computer. In Hackatorium<br>
'''Thursday, February 19th, 2015, 7ish to whenever:''' -- The return of [[User:Malaclyps|Danny O'Brien]].<br>
'''Saturday, February 28th, 2015, 8pm to ?:''' [[ProjectX]] -- Participatory art/music/hack party. Expect anything. In Hackatorium, Turing and Church.<br>
'''Friday, June 26th, 2015, 7am to 6pm:''' Library event (''details hacked as Summertime approaches'')
<div class="recurring-events">

=== Recurring Events <small>[https://www.noisebridge.net/index.php?title=Category:Events&action=edit&section=3 edit]</small> ===

{{Template:Recurring}} - Every week.<br>
{{Template:RecurringNumbered|1st}} - Certain weeks, e.g. 1st week only.<br>
{{Template:RecurringException|-2nd}} - Except certain weeks, or other schedule exceptions.


==== Mondays ====
* {{Template:Recurring}} '''7:30 pm - 10:00 pm [[Circuit Hacking Mondays]]'''  <span style="color:black">''</span><div style="padding-left: 30px; max-width: 725px;">- Learn to solder! And make cool things with electronics. [[User:maltman23|Mitch]], Rolf, [[User:Miloh|Miloh]], [[User:Cedric|Cedric]], Cheng, Greg, and/or a host of others will bring kits-for-purchase to make cool, hackable things for all skill levels that you can bring home after you make them! Many designed for '''absolute beginners'''! Bring your own projects to hack! Bring things to fix! All ages. All are welcome! See the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss Discuss list] and the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-announce Announce list] for weekly updates.</div>
* {{Template:Recurring}} '''8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[Front-end Web Development]]''' - Learn HTML/CSS/JS. A series of talks on different topics every week. Recap of last week's material starts at 7:30 pm. Join the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/webdev WebDev list] or the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-announce Announce list] for updates.
* {{Template:Recurring}} [[House_Keeping#Trash_and_Recycling|Take Out the Trash Night -- Round One]] Be sure to put bins out by midnight as the trash truck comes between 1:30 to 2:30am.

==== Tuesdays - ''Super'' Tuesdays! ====

* {{Template:Recurring}} '''7:00 pm - 9:00 pm [http://www.railsschool.org Ruby and Rails class]''' - Seminar and workshop for learning everything about Ruby, Rails, and web application development (Church classroom). See the [https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-announce Announce list] for weekly updates.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm [[PyClass]] - '''Intermediate Python with PyClass''' - Crash course in the Python standard library
* {{Template:Recurring}} '''7:00 pm [[Meetings|Noisebridge Weekly Meeting]]''' - Introducing new people and events to the space, general discussion, and decision-making on key issues. '''This is your space, folks. Come on out here in person to express what you think about what's going on with it!'''

==== Wednesdays ====

* {{Template:Recurring}} 6:00 pm - 8:00pm SF-LUG Weekly Linux Discussion Group, held in the Turing classroom.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm [[PyClass]] - '''Intermediate Python with PyClass''' - Crash course in the Python standard library
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} {{Template:RecurringException|alternating monthly}} 7:00 pm - 9:30 pm '''Next NB meetup 25th Feb, alternating monthly between SF and South Bay''' - [[Cyberspectrum|Cyberspectrum: Software Defined Radio Meetup]] in Hackatorium '''(new)''': A place to learn and exchange ideas about SDR. Presentations on concepts, mystery signals, hardware/software and cool applications.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[DreamTeam| Dream Team Neuro Hackery]] - EEG research & development project with general interest in sleep, dreaming, creative intelligence, and many loosely related topics such as: neurophysiology, signal processing, cognitive neuroscience, and (especially) hacking code and devices for data acquisition and analysis. Join us at the [[CollaborationStation]] (near the Hackatorium). Expect general discussion around 8 PM - usually moving along by 9 PM to focus on more technical aspects of current project.

==== Thursdays ====
* {{Template:Recurring}} [[House_Keeping#Trash_and_Recycling|Trash Night -- Round Two]] - Take out the trash for Friday morning! Do it by midnight as truck comes 1:30-2:30am.

* {{Template:Recurring}} 7:00 pm [[Digital Archivists]] - Learn how to scan books and help build book scanners.

* {{Template:Recurring}} {{Template:RecurringException|-3rd}} 7:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[3D Thursday]] Weekly meetup (non-3rd-thursdays) at Noisebridge focusing on 3D Printers, CNC machines, FabLabs, and replicating machines of all kinds.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[Front-end_Web_Development#Lab|Front-end Web Development Lab]] - Understand by doing! A recap of Monday's lecture in workshop form - and a good time for one-on-one help with the material.
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} '''8:00 pm [[Five Minutes of Fame]]''' a.k.a. 5MoF - lightning 5min talks every 3rd Thursday of the month

==== Fridays ====
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|1st}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|5th}} 6:00 pm - 8:00 pm [[Computerology]] in Turing or [[CollaborationStation]], understanding and using computers
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|1st}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|3rd}} {{Template:RecurringNumbered|5th}} 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm [[FUN Tutoring]] @ [[CollaborationStation]]

==== Saturdays ====
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|2nd}} 12:00 pm - 2:00 pm '''[[Godwafflenoisepancakes]]''' An afternoon of noise music and vegan pancakes. Monthly dates vary. Next show is January 10th, 2015 @12:00 with Leah Peah and Fenian. Turn it up... bring the noise!!!

* {{Template:Recurring}} 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm [[Learn C++]] - Learn C++ in Turing.

==== Sundays ====
* {{Template:Recurring}} 12:30 pm - 7:30 pm [[Dungeons and Dragons]] in Church, currently looking for new players.
* {{Template:RecurringException|alternating monthly}} 1:00 pm Monthly Lock Sport Collaboration: Come learn how to pick locks and learn more about them with the [http://www.tooolsf.org/ SF Bay Area chapter] of [http://toool.us/ TOOOL]. The group meets on alternating months at Noisebridge and in San Jose. Check the [https://groups.google.com/forum/#!forum/tooolsf-announce TOOOL SF announcement list] for details.
* {{Template:RecurringNumbered|2nd}} 2:00 pm [[BAHA]] - [http://baha.bitrot.info Bay Area Hacker's Association] - security meeting
* {{Template:Recurring}} 3:00 pm [[Go]] - Playing of the Go board game. On nice days we often take the boards to Dolores Park and play there.
* {{Template:Recurring}} 6:00 pm [[Plan 9]] class (if not Noisebridge check Sycamore)
</div>
</onlyinclude>

If you'd like to contact somebody at Noisebridge regarding these Events or even the Noisebridge Wiki itself, then please send an email message to one of the Board members listed in the [[Contacts]] list, e.g., <secretary@noisebridge.net> or <treasurer@noisebridge.net>

=== Orphaned Events ===
These events appear to be dormant or extinct.

* SAT 10:15 - 12:10 [[Juggling with Judy!]] Note: next class is scheduled for Saturday June 29th. Attention juggling fans! Judy will be at the 2013 World Juggling Day celebration Saturday June 15th at Ripley's Believe It Or Not Odditorium in San Francisco Fisherman's Warf - free event begins at 1. Come check it out!
* THU 18:00 - 21:00 '''[[Privacy Bay]]''' - A monthly meetup for Bay Area folks interested in privacy. Meets in Church on the last Thursday of the month.
* FRI 19:00 - 21:00 [[Anarchy_101|Anarchy 101]] - a class/seminar on what anarchy is and is not, and how it impacts us as individuals and as discrete groups.
* SUN 13:00 [[Songbridge]]: (Bi-monthly) Learn how to make and record music with a computerWe cover midi and vst as well as multi-track recordingBring your laptop.
* 20:00 - 22:00 [[Noise~_Wednesday | Noise~ Wed]] - Graphical media programming with Max/MSP/Jitter

*19:00 [[Tahoe-LAFS]] - Occasional meetup of users and/or developers of the Least Authority File System.

* 14:00 - 16:00 Android Developer Support Group - Meet up with other app developers in the library for a lightly structured knowledge-share.

=== Proposed Future Events and Classes ===
:'''(TBD)''': [[Sound Science]] A potential monthly lecture/demonstration series on the little known science behind sound reproductionTopics to include: Transducer Physics(speakers and mics), Room Acoustics, Signal Path and Cabling,Loudspeaker design 101, Music Production Tips for Big Sound, and How to make a small system sound HUGEEach session to include hands on projects like making speakers from stuff lying around, Non-Newtonian bass monsters, and ez speaker mods for anyoneIf interested contact the new guy-> MattLong8 at gmail dot com, 805 four five three - six zero nine seven
:'''(TBD)''': [[Modular Synthesis]] a bi-weekly (or monthly) group devoted to modular synthesizers> workshop will include modular sound synthesis styles and techniques, a study of different modules and their functions, ie voltage controlled oscillator, voltage controlled filter, low frequency oscillator, envelope generator ect and how these modules interact with each other, what control voltage and triggers are..... as well as one on one time for each student with the modular, which is a 60 space large format Moog style modular synthesizer with big knobs and 1/4 jacks including performance and other awesomeness by Douglas. contact Douglas at greenshoos at gmail dotcom
:'''(TBD)''': [[VideoHacking]] a weekly video/video art devoted hacker group, including experiments in the 3D vr realm...if interested contact julialc4@gmail.com
:Wednesdays at 21:00 [[Brewing Bridge]] - Malakkar Proposal: Learn how to make your drinks fun AND antibacterial, using yeastThis will be recurring if enough interest or need is presentAssociated items - what to do with brewing leftovers, and brewers sample hour, etc.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Probability]] - Weekly probability study group based on [http://ocw.mit.edu/courses/electrical-engineering-and-computer-science/6-041-probabilistic-systems-analysis-and-applied-probability-spring-2006/related-resources/ Fundamentals of Applied Probability Theory] by Al Drake
:'''(TBD)''': [[Mandarin Corner|Mandarin]] - Learn or practice Mandarin, all levels. Also currently on hiatus. Get on the mailing list.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Movie Night!]] - [[User:ThOMG|Thom]] wants to build community through nerdy sci-fi! (+Bill+Ted+Excellence++) (how about a Friday hacker movie night? -[[User:Carl|Carl]])
:'''(TBD)''': [[Introduction to the AVR Microcontroller]] - [[User:Mightyohm|Jeff]] and [[User:Maltman23|Mitch]] are planning an introductory class for people wanting to make cool projects with AVRs.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Basic Chemistry Lab Techniques]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Cuddle Puddle for the Economy]] - Stress-hacking with informal massage exchange.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Milk and Cookies]] - Come read your favorite selections out loudWith Milk and Cookies (and yeah, probably beer too).
:'''(TBD)''': [[Processing Workshop 2]] - [[User:Scmurray|Scott]] is interested in teaching this, and is busy thinking about what, where, when, why, and how.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Hack your Hardware]] -- We call BS on "no user-serviceable parts inside"
:'''(TBD)''': [[Homebrew Instruction Class]] - The Wort (pt 1/3)
:'''(TBD)''': [[Trip to Shooting Range]] - Field trip to a shooting range, to shoot guns Express interest at [[Trip to Shooting Range]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Surface Mount Soldering Workshop]] - Learn how to solder cicuits with small surface mount parts [[User:maltman23|Mitch Altman]] and Martin Bogomolni and others will show their tricks [[User:maltman23|Mitch]] will bring hackable kits that uses surface mounts for you to solder<-YES!(mattlong8 at gmail dot com)
:'''(TBD)''' - [[Locksport and Lockpicking]]
:'''(TBD)''' - [[Version control tutorial]]
:'''(TBD)''' - [[Foreign language learning for rocket scientists]] - I'm near-native (fool people when I try) in (French and) Japanese, and a pro trans/terpreter and will share my shortcuts (skill-order, vocab, speed/articulation, translation≅grammar)No expertise on tonal languages yet..so if you know how to remember tones or how tone-sandhi interacts with speed and/or how nuances of speaker attitude are expressed in them (what we do with rythm/inflection/sentence-intonation and stress in Eng., and with particles and ??? in e.gCantonese) please chime in or call me (415-608-0564) so I can convey your wisdom[also looking for a from-scratch Arabic partner]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Getting started with Arduino]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Distributed Databases]]
:'''(TBD)''': [[Node.js Beginners Session]] - Interested in learning about Node.js? I amMaybe these guys want to teach it: http://www.meetup.com/Joyent-Cloud-User-Group/events/81311542/

:'''(TBD)''': [[Scrum Club]] - I though I'd test the waters and see if anyone was interested in a noisebridge scrum club details are here http://scrumclub.org/scrum-clubs/ if inturested hit me up twitter: @theabcasian, facebook: http://www.facebook.com/theabcasian
:'''(TBD)''': [[CNC Mill Workshop]] - Who wants to make stuff on the [[MaxNCMill]]?
:'''(TBD)''': [[Math & Science Help]] - If you would like some math, science or engineering help, I'm down to lend a hand.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Cyborg Group|Cyborg Group / Sensebridge]] - Work on projects like artificial senses Someone needs to lead this!
:'''(TBD)''': [[OpenEEG]] - Brain techHas historically met on Sundays, at the behest of interested parties.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Programming_for_Poets | Programming for Poets]] - Gentle intro to programming using Processing
:'''(TBD)''': [[World Builders & Simgineers]] - Work together to create a beautiful & open virtual world & platform.
:'''(TBD)''': [[PlunderBridge]] - Metal detecting, detector technology & treasure hunting expeditions.
:'''(TBD)''': [[Ruby Mining]] - Ruby on Rails basics, interactive working group
:'''(TBD)''': [[MoinMoin Wiki]] - MoinMoin Wiki (details see there)
:'''(TBD)''': [[Noisebridge Fundraiser 2013]]

= Past Events =

===2014===
*{{event
|time = Sunday, September 23, 5:00pm
|title = How to Start a Startup MOOC Lecture Viewings
|description = We would get together to watch the lectures together and conduct discussion and networking afterwards. http://startupclass.samaltman.com/
|}}

===2013===
*{{event
|time = Friday, August 9, 5:00pm
|title = Noisebridge Party Setup
|description = Volunteers will be preparing the space for Saturday's show. There are no scheduled conflicts; you might be asked to move multiple times by someone pushing a broom and assembling a raised stage simultaneously.
|}}

*{{event
|time = Saturday, August 10, 4:00pm
|title = Noisebridge "______ the Bridge" Party
|description = <span style="color:#ff00ff; background:##ff00ff"> a summer fundraising party for Noisebridge, which YOU are invited to!</span>
|suggested donation = $10, but no one turned away for lack of funds
|}}

*{{event
|time = Sunday, August 11, 2:00pm
|title = Bay Area Hackers' Association Meeting
|description = Jon Callas presenting on [[BAHA/2013-08-11|Secure Communications, Privacy, Counter-Surveillance]].
|}}

* '''Wednesday, May 22, 7.00 pm: Instructables Build Night''' - Bare Conductive, Instructables will supply Bare Conductive paint pens and pizza. Come experiment with the paint and post some Instructables. This is a FREE event.

===2012===
* '''December 20, Thursday, 20:00 - 22:00 - [[5MoF|5 Minutes of Fame]]''' - Following up on its triumphant return in November, 5MoF is back with another showcase of lightning talks & other good stuff, with your host Sir Danny O'Brien! Details TBA
*'''Tuesday Feb14th, 18:00 to 20:00''' ZiP MegaZine releases its inaugural issue with '''My Noisy Valentine''' Zine Release Microparty in the Noisebridge cafeFor more info follow [[zine | this]] link.
* '''Wednesday, Jan30, 20:00-22:00''' [[zine|ZiP]] meeting for zine-makers & others with an interest in printing & self-publishingThe meeting 1/30/13 is our first since mid-2012We plan to hold them regularly from now on at this time (Wednesday 8pm)This meeting will be informal & will probably take place in the printing/lasercutter area of the hackerspace.

===2011===

* '''September 11th 14:00 to 17:00''' - The San Francisco Chapter of the Open Organisation Of Lockpickers and Bay Area Hacker's Association present a joint meeting on [https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Locksport locksport]
*'''August 4, 7PM, Thursday''' - [http://zeidman.net Bob Zeidman] will be giving a talk on video games and intellectual property, hosted by TheMADEHe will also speak about IP infringement cases.
*'''August 9, 6:30PM, Tuesday''' - [http://www.meetup.com/makesf/events/26413241/ Make:SF] - Chris Jefferies will speak about the wireless sensor kit he is developing and we are bringing back our all star soldering kits.

* '''April 13th, 19:00''' - Kombucha fermentation class with [[BioBridge]]
*'''April 7th, 20:00''' - [[In-Depth|Noisebridge: In-Depth]] Our monthly lecture and round tableThis month's speaker will be Aragorn! his lecture will be "Anarchism & technology: An unbridgeable chasm"
*'''April 4th, 20:00''' - Camp KDE PartyCome and meet part of the KDE North America community and get a quick overview of this year's [http://camp.kde.org/ Camp KDE] conferenceThere will be beer
*'''April 3rd, 16:00''' - NoiseCaching: Meet-up to build some geocaches, and talk about making geocoinsThen we'll head out to find some local caches and place caches we made[http://www.geocaching.com More info about Geocaching here]
* '''March 20th, 19:00''' [[Hack Politics]] meetup -- the first meetup to figure out how we in the hacker community can effectively mobilize and create meaningful change in these interesting times
* '''March 12th, 12:00-18:00 - Noisebridge Hackathon!''' Second Saturday Hackathon is a casual monthly event dedicated to working on the space or relevant projects and building community This is a great time to get feedback or help on any projects you have been considering that center around the space, culture, and infrastructure of Noisebridge You can also help with existing projects and find out ways to get involved.
* '''March 10, Thursday, 19:00 - Group Grammar Clinic''' - Church Classroom - Donations gladly accepted - A clinic for grammar and writing evaluationPlease bring your web/social or technical writing for us to evaluateBring your laptop as well Collaboration groupware possibly provided(Please suggest groupware software to use if you wish)Constructive feedback from other group members is encouraged so that this clinic is a group process- Facilitator: [[User:Owen|Owen]] (opietro@yahoo.com)
* '''March 9th, 20:00''' - Ferment and filter a mash! [[fermentation logs]]

===2010===
* '''Sunday, August 22, 19:00 CLUB-MATE DROPOFF AND TASTING PARTY''' Nick Farr will be in town to drop off Club-Mate ordered by San Franciscans!
* '''June 5th, 12:00-19:00 - [[NoiseBridgeRehab]]''' - Help make the space more usable and accessible! Noisebridge needs your help!
* '''June 5th, 16:00-20:00 - [[Science For Juggalos]]''' - Science Fair in front of the Warfield Theater teaching magnetism to Juggalos
* '''June 6th, 15:00 - [[AVC Meetup]]''' - Entrepreneurial bonding & matchmaking
* '''June 9th, 21:00 - Your liver supports Noisebridge''' - Come to Elixir @ 16th & Guerrero anytime after 21:00 and drink, drink, drink! 50% of tips go to Noisebridge
* '''February 27th, 20:00 - [[Hacker EPROM]]''' - Noisebridge's first prom! Nice tie and a (robot) date requiredWe will have a DJ and punch.
* '''February 24th, 19:00, Wednesday - Joris Peels, of [http://www.shapeways.com Shapeways]''', and expert on 3D printing, will give a [[ShaperwaysPresentation | talk and demonstration]] at Noisebridge!.
* '''February 23rd, 18:00 - Cleaning day''' - Come and help clean Noisebridge, because everyone loves a clean hack space.
* '''February 12th, 21:00 - visit from Steve Jackson'''Game designer [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steve_Jackson_%28US_game_designer%29 Steve Jackson], founder of Steve Jackson Games, will visit Noisebridge.
* '''January 27th, 18:00-20:00 - [[beatrixjar event|Circuit Bending Workshop]]''' - [http://www.beatrixjar.com/ Beatrix*JAR] (contact [[User:Gpvillamil|Gian Pablo]] for more info)
* '''January 27th, 20:00-22:00 - [[beatrixjar event|Circuit Bending Performance]]''' - [http://www.beatrixjar.com/ Beatrix*JAR] - "Celebrate a night of new sound that will change your idea of music forever!"
* '''January 25th, 19:30 - [[Bag Porn]]''' - What's in your bag?
* '''January 20th, 19:00-21:00 - [http://groups.google.com/group/bacat/about Bay Categories & Types]''' - Categories, monoids, monads, functors and more! Held in the Alonzo Church classroom.
* '''January 20th, 19:00 - [[User Experience Book Club SF]]''' - Our book this month is "A Theory of Fun for Game Design" by Raph Koster - http://is.gd/6sEqw (meets in Turing)
* '''January 21st, 20:00 - [[Five Minutes of Fame]]''' - Monthly set of lightning talks on diverse topics
* '''January 22nd, 17:00 - [[CleaningParty| Cleaning Party]]''' - Come help clean up Noisebridge! Awsum fun!
* ...January 14th,16th, and 17th 1:00- ??? Build Out day for kitchen/bathroom/laundry bring yourself and a good attitude, learn a few things as well
* '''January 15th, 18:00 - [[CNC_Mill_Workshop]]''' - Learn to use the CNC mill for 2D engraving and circuit board routing
* Thursdays 17:00 [[ASL Group|American Sign Language]] - Learn how to talk without using your voice (or just come chat in ASL)<small>[http://whenisgood.net/noisebridge/asl/generic click to reschedule]</small>

===2009===
* '''November 18th, 19:30''' - [[Dorkbot_2009_11_18|Dorkbot]]
* '''November 19th, 18:00''' - [[Mesh meetup]]
* '''November 19th, 20:00''' - [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
* '''November 20th, 18:00''' - Loud Objects [http://www.flickr.com/photos/createdigitalmedia/3428249036/ Noise Toy workshop].
* '''November 20th, 20:00''' - Performance by [http://www.loudobjects.com/ Loud Objects], (featuring Tristan Perich and Lesley Flanigan) and [http://www.myspace.com/jibkidder Jib Kidder].
:'''2009-11-05''' - [http://www.server-sky.com/ Server Sky presentation: Internet and Computation in Orbit] by Keith Lofstrom
:'''2009-11-05''' - [[Mesh meetup]]
:'''2009-11-02''' - [[French]] book club meeting to discuss [http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/2842612892/ref=ord_cart_shr?_encoding=UTF8&m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&v=glance Une Si Longue Lettre]
: ''' October 1st, 18:00''' - [[Wireless_Mesh_Network_Meetup | Mesh wireless meetup]]
: ''' October 1st, 19:00''' - [http://groups.google.com/group/bacat Bay Area Categories and Types]
: '''2009-10-03''' [[Year 1 Open Hacker House]]
:'''Friday''': [[CrazyCryptoNight]] - Discussion of cryptography for beginners through experts6-???
:'''Sunday''' : [[OpenEEG | OpenEEG Hacking]] Sundays, at 3-5pm.
:'''Monday''': [[German]] - Learn German, all levels7pm beginners, 8pm advancedRSVP 24 hours in advance for the benefit of the instructorEvents ran May-November 2009Currently on Thursdays at 8Get on the mailing list.
:'''Tuesday''': [[Haskell/Haschool]] - Learn Haskell with Jason Dusek 6PM - 7:30PM, from May until we're all experts.
:'''Wednesday''': [[Adobe_Lightroom|Adobe Lightroom]] - Become a more organized photographerWeekly class (mostly held off site).
:'''Thursday''': [[Professional VFX Compositing With Adobe After Effects]] - Taught by [[User:SFSlim|Aaron Muszalski]]7:30PM - 10PM, most Thursdays in May & June & ? (click through dammit)
:'''2009-09-17''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] 3D Edition
:'''2009-09-17''': [[Wireless Mesh Network Meetup | Mesh wireless meetup]]
:'''2009-08-20''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] One Dee Edition
:'''2009-07-16''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] Zero Dee
:'''2009-07-02 - 2009-07-05''': [http://toorcamp.org Toorcamp]
:'''2009-07-01''': Noisedroid meeting to discuss location logging on Android platform (and other stuff too, I'm sure)
:'''2009-06-30''': [[Powerbocking Class|Powerbocking class]]
:'''2009-06-30''': "Suing Telemarketers for Fun and Profit" (Toorcamp talk preview)
:'''2009-06-28''': "Meditation for Hackers" (Toorcamp workshop preview)
:'''2009-06-18''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
:'''2009-06-15''': [[Eagle Workshop]] Session two of the Eagle CAD workshop.
:'''2009-06-13''': [[RoboGames 2009]] Noisebridge had a booth staffed by vounteers, great fun!
:'''2009-05-21''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
:'''2009-04-27''': [[EagleCAD workshop]] -- learn to use this CAD tool for printed circuit board design
:'''2009-04-16''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]] April showers & flowers edition
:'''2009-04-11''': [[RFID Hacking]] weekend workshop (this event moved from the original March date)
:'''2009-04-05''': [[First aid and CPR class]] Learning how to not only not die, but also reduce scarring!
:'''2009-04-03''': [[Sudo pop]] 2PM and onMaking the first batch of a Noisebridge label yerba mate-niated rootbrew, gratis and DIY
:'''2009-03-26''': [[OpenEEG | OpenEEG Hacking]] first meet up for this new group: 8 pm
:'''2009-03-19''': [[Five Minutes of Fame]]
:'''2009-03-12''': [[OpenBTS and GSM]] talk by David Burgess
:'''2009-02-14''': [[Open Heart Workshop]] Valentine's Day blinkyheart soldering party!
:'''2009-02-13''': [[Time-t_Party|<tt>time_t</tt> Party]] to celebrate 1,234,567,890 since the Unix epoch.
:'''2009-02-09''': [[Spanish learning at 8:30]]
:'''2009-02-05''': [[PGP Key Workshop]]
:'''2009-01-31''': [[Locksport and Lockpicking]]

===2008===
:'''2008-12-27''': [[25C3]] Chaos Computer Congress in Berlin
:'''2008-12-20 & 21''': [[Creme Brulee]] Workshop on creating a french dessert, with bonus propane torch.
:'''2008-12-17 20:00''': [[Machine Learning]] Birds-of-a-feather
:'''2008-11-24''': [[Circuit Hacking Monday]] circuit design workshop
:'''2008-11-21, 7pm''':[[Milk and Cookies]] -- [[User:Dmolnar|David Molnar]] hosts Milk and Cookies at 83CBring a short 5-7minute thing to read to othersBring a potluck cookie/snack/drink if you likeDavid will bring milk and cookies.
:'''2008-11-17, 7:30pm''': [[Basic Bicycle Maintain]] - [[User:rubin110|Rubin]] and [[User:rigel|rigel]] hate it when we see a bike that isn't maintainedScreechy chains and clacking derailleur can go to hellBasic bike tune up, sharing the smarts on simple things you can do at home to make your ride suck a whole lot less.
:'''2008-11-16, 5:00pm''': [[RepRap Soldering Party]] - help assemble RepRap! RSVPs required on wiki! [[User:Adi|adi]]
:'''2008-11-16, 3:00pm''': [[Oscilloscopes]] - Learn how to use this versatile tool to test electronic circuits Maximum 6 slots, please sign up ahead of time! [[User:dstaff|dstaff]]
:'''2008-10-31''': [[Halloween Open House]] - NoiseBridge's own [[PPPC]] threw an awesome open house/halloween galaPost pictures if you got 'em!
:'''2008-10-25''': [[Soldering Workshop]] and Pumpkin Hackin' - Learn to solder for total newbies (or learn to solder better!), including surface mountAdditionally, carve your halloween pumpkins and enjoy some experimental pumpkin pie and/or soup.
:'''2008-10-07''': (tuesday before meeting) - Etch a circuit boardI'll be trying a photo resist etching and a basic printed mask etchingThis is step 1/3 for a project called "annoying USB thingie" which will execute pre-defined keystrokes by sneaking a tiny USB dongle onto a victim^h^h^h^h^h buddy's computer.
:'''2008-09-13''': [[Processing Workshop]] — Learn this very easy-to-use programming language! - [[Processing Workshop Report]]
:'''2008-02-16''': [[Brain Machine Workshop|Brain Machine Making Workshop]]: Our first hardware sprint!

[[Category:Top level]]